tomorrow is friday the 13th o.O
i DARE it to give me worse luck than i already have. i dare it.
tonight i'm not in that bad of a mood.
maybe it'll be the first night all week i won't cry myself to sleep. maybe.
oh &i wanna move in with sra. farr. she said i could..

so i was reading through an old diary &i read about a night
where i thought my parents were going to get divorced. November 2, 2002.
flash forward to November of 2005. my parents are actually getting divorced.
yea, just in case you didn't know before, you do now.
so i'm guna blame that for my crazy random bursts of emo, k?
i hate being sad. i hate ( Read more... )

i wish more of the people i'm closer with are doing lacrosse.
today we were supposed to get into groups of 4 people..
&mallory, katie, remi, &addy were like "US 4! US 4!" &i was like.. :( sad.
sure, lets just leave monica out. who cares. they didn't even ask if i wanted to be with them. :/
whatev i'm not guna sit here &bitch about it anymore.
oh &sra. ( Read more... )

so over this break i:
-helped a friend who was drunk.
-laughed at a friend who was drunk.
-watched the entire season of Laguna Beach in one day, on MTV.
-vegetated in my house.
-spent new years with almost all of my favorites.
-stayed up all night.
-vegetated some more.
-made a waitress slit her wrists very rich.
-started &finished a million little pieces. ( Read more... )

( PICTURESPICTURESPICTURES! )

i had a hard time sleeping last night.
i went to sleep early-ish, around 11:30. then i woke up at 2, 3, 3:30, 6:50, &11:15.
i had weird dreams, too.
i haven't done a damn thing today other than clean. i'm still in PJs &everything.
my guess is this is how i'll spend my night too.
being that i have no plans, no ones called me with plans, &i don't feel ( Read more... )

last year at this time i had a boyfriend.
last year at this time i was really happy.
last year at this time i had someone who cared about me &made me feel good.
last year at this time, i liked myself.
..until everything blew up in my face.
then i hated myself.
i miss feeling wanted.. :(

so far this year i have:
-watched my friends burn the grass light fireworks in my backyard.
-learned some new words while playing dictionary (lobo, octoroon, morass, luvet, etc)
-forced everyone to listen to my emo music, even though most of them just wanted to sleep
-played spit on my kitchen floor at 5
-walked on a golfcourse at 5:30 in the morning ( Read more... )

last update of the year.
its so weird.. that this year is over now.
i mean, as much as i want it to be over.. its like.. shocking? i guess?
tonight should be interesting. i'm hoping for fun.
even though some people i wanted to be there can't come. :/
(ie: sara, troy, megan, rachel, etc).
goodbye 2005, helloooooooooo 2 double 06.

my mom just totally killed my day. it seems really bratty of me but i'm
really pissed now :( for hanukkah, she wrapped a box.. &when i
unwrapped it i found an abercrombie &fitch box. so i thought it was a
pair of jeans (liked i'd ask for).. &instead it was a really
ugly roxy purse :( bah. i sound like a brat but i
was really excited for jeans. :(
way too ( Read more... )