Part: 6/?
Pairing: Mark/Addison
Description: Post Season 3. Addison leaves for L.A. hoping that no one will get in her way of finding a new life.
Rating: No smut yet.
Disclaimer: Not mine.
Summary: First days and bad weeks.
Previous chapters can be found inside.
Enjoy!
Part 1: There's been too many days of trying. Part 2: Dancing in circles, making me sick. Part 3: Too late to learn from experience. Part 4: From a heart that has suffered...from a mind that is strangled. Part 5: Just one more plane ride and it's done. A/N: Alright after some slight persuasion I have continued to keep cross-posting this. Really I was only trying to make sure that I had readers so I wasn't clogging up the board for no good reason. That being said thank you for the reviews, they make me smile, and thanks to my beta
escapismrocks. Oh, and I held onto this until after the premiere because I was looking to make sure the LA group wasn't out of character too radically.
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All I ever needed
Someone to believe in
Anything that I could do
Maybe there's something beautiful
Hidden deep in my bones
I'll get as far as I can go
Where I run, you never will know
When you're left there lying alone
Know I'm never coming home
-Crossfade- “Never Coming Home”
~-~-~-~-~-~
One short week later, four meetings with realtors, seven open houses, and countless cups of coffee while pouring over reality listings Addison finds her new home on the beach. She quickly begins the ever annoying job of unpacking everything from her previous life. Her first notion was to literally throw everything from New York away but thought better of it because really it wasn’t all that bad. Moving boxes to their respective rooms and slowly pouring over all that her life had been was, in the beginning, daunting and painful but now she is reveling in the old memories and she honestly feels like she is beginning to find the person she lost all of those years ago.
She rips the tape off a box labeled kitchen to find the old china that they very seldom used when they were together. Derek hated the pattern (or the entire thought of owning china), she hated the color scheme and it was all an incredibly inconsiderate gift. She kicks the box aside and reaches for the next one to discover the ever useful blender. Glancing at the clock and realizing that. while it is her day off, it is probably still too early to start making drinks.
She tiptoes her way to the stereo and turns on her favorite music that her ex-husband once hated. It has been years but her feet still find the beat effortlessly and her voice the words without concentration as she heads for the living room.
Her hands lift an old keepsake out of the box. Another gift from a wedding that probably never should have happened. She hastily sets it back into the box and decides that perhaps hanging pictures would be a better plan of attack. Fumbling through more pictures, her old life slaps her in the face again this time in the form of a graduation picture. She is stuck between the two men in her life and looking back she laughs a little because it really should have been some sort of sign, then and there.
~-~-~-~-~-~-~
One ridiculously long week later, five nights of sleeping in an on-call room to avoid going home, endless cups of scotch, and no new women to speak of and Mark thinks he may just be dying without her. He is suddenly regretting not asking her to call because there isn’t much he wouldn’t give just to hear her voice again. He feels sad and pathetic in ways he hasn’t felt since he was 7 and struck out in his little league game effectively ending his team’s hopes and dreams of becoming the district champions. He thinks of asking Derek how he is doing, dreaming for some form of bond to come back but thinks better of it. Derek doesn’t care in the slightest, at least from what he can tell. Life is good with Meredith once again or so the gossip mills say.
He tosses from side to side on the top bunk in on-call room 6. There is someone below him trying to sleep but he really couldn’t care less in this moment. He flips over onto his back with a long exhausted sigh coming out of his mouth. He swears he hasn’t slept a wink since she left. This led to him being kicked out of surgery and sent to sleep by the same old returning chief who hates him but no one understands why Mark isn’t sleeping. One wouldn’t think that he could become so affected by a woman that he couldn’t muster the energy to close his eyes and relax so he doesn’t answer when they ask.
Rolling onto his side yet again his mind is stuck like a broken record on the words he said to her that night in the airport. He said he loved her right? Wait, yes and then she said she didn’t love him and was leaving anyway. Another dagger piercing his heart and he begins to feel his eyes well with a form of moisture they haven’t felt since her original departure almost a year ago. He wills himself to stop before he even starts because he is in a public area and twists over onto his stomach to muffle his heavy and ragged breathing.
“Could you stop up there? Or just go to sleep Mark, for the love of god the world isn’t ending.” Derek mutters out from under the pillow he is holding over his face.
“Derek?” He doesn’t have to ask. They grew up together; he knows the sound of his voice better than his own.
“Yeah. Go to sleep. You are driving me insane down here and I only have an hour before my next surgery.”
“Grey wearing you out?” He attempts to joke.
“Right, that’s it. We’ve been having make up sex non-stop for the last four days and I really need to sleep.”
“Really?” He isn’t really interested but figures he isn’t getting any sleep so he may as well try a conversation.
More than annoyed he removes his pillow and answers, “No. Go to sleep!”
“I can’t.” He aches out from his viewpoint and tries to glance down at Derek below him.
“Why the hell not? You look like shit. You honestly look like you haven’t slept in days.”
“I haven’t.” He peers his head over the railing again and tries to stem the feeling of being in one of their six year old sleep-overs when Derek would coax Mark to sleep after he got down spilling his guts on how awful his family was.
“Well then what is the freakin’ problem? Close your eyes, take a deep breathe and relax.”
“Don’t you think I have tried that? Don’t you think I want to sleep? I am exhausted Derek…but I can’t.”
Catching on slowly but surely he quips, “If you open your mouth one more time and tell me that this is about Addison leaving I will come up there and personally beat the lunacy out of you.” He receives no reply. “Hello? Did you finally fall asleep?”
“No.” He states as he flips back over onto his side facing the wall and folding his arms in a huff of movement.
“Well then why aren’t you answering me?”
“You told me not to tell you it was all about Addison, so I can’t say anything because it is, in fact, all about Addison.”
“It’s always about Addison. You are ridiculous. She is gone. Gone Mark, not coming home. Let it go. Go find a nursing student to screw or something.”
“Not interested.”
“Listen to you. You sound like a sullen five year old that dropped his ice cream on the sidewalk.” He remarks while conceding to the fact that there will be no sleeping.
“Well I feel like a sullen thirty-nine year old who just lost the love of his life. Shut up, shut up before you even say it. Yeah, yeah. Your wife. I got the memo, a thousand times so leave me alone and go find your own on-call room to sleep in.”
Derek rises before turning back to the man holding his knees on the top bunk. He reaches out and places his hand on his back in a very uncharacteristic move. He hates to see him hurting, well actually he is kind of welcome to the idea of her ripping out his heart too, but a brother is a brother. “It will be okay Mark. You’ll get over her, move on, and find the real one that has been waiting for you. She isn’t that great, trust me. Just give it time.” He heads for the door quickly and releases himself from his old best-friend’s personal hell.
“She is spectacular and you never noticed. Nothing is alright.” He whispers before sitting up and knocking his head on the wall in an attempt to focus.
~-~-~-~-~-~
“Red.” Pete calls from his place in the lobby.
“Quack.” She confirms holding the doors open on the elevator. “Hurry up. I don’t want to be late for my first day.”
He holds back staying a foot away from the elevator. “I don’t know if I want to get in there with you. Who knows what could happen.” He lets the smile spread across his mouth as she grows increasingly uncomfortable.
“I am not interested. Now are you getting in or not?” She raises her eyebrows trying to stay calm.
“In.” He steps in quickly before Tilly’s booming voice takes over.
“Dr. Montgomery you came back so quick. It is good to have you.”
“Thank you Tilly.” She turns to Pete who is leaning against the back wall. “It’s good to be back.”
“Uh-huh. I never should have told you about her.”
“What?”
“Then you could carry on with your elevator god conversations.”
“Who told you- I mean what are you talking about?”
“Ah, Red. You will see. Sometimes we all like to get together and have a laugh over the elevator tapes. Yours has proved quite entertaining.”
“Pleasure from other’s pain. You are a jackass.”
He cocks his head to the side. “True, and from what I’ve heard about you that is totally your type.”
As the doors fling open she steps out with him. “I don’t have a type.” And for good measure, “And I’m not interested in you at all. Ever. So don’t go getting your dreams up at night when you lay alone in your empty bed thinking of me.”
“Touché. I can see we are going to have a lot of fun around here.”
“We had fun before.” Sam scowls before making his way over to Addison and quickly hugging her. “How is our newest addition today?”
Smiling proudly and taking a deep breath of her new life she replies, “Good. I am doing very well.”
“You like it so far?” Sam continues on.
“I’ve only gotten lost about twelve hundred times but I think I am starting to get the hang of things.”
“I could take you out and maybe show you around the town if you like.” Pete quickly supplies.
“Are you asking me out?” She grins coyly.
“No. He isn’t. Excuse us; don’t you have an appointment or something?” Sam asks firmly. Pete stalks off in the general direction of his office while adding, “Nope.”
“Sorry, you will just have to ignore him for awhile until he takes the hint.”
“No consorting Sam, I know. I am big girl. I can take care of myself.”
“Good because I would hate to have to beat up a co-worker for breaking my friend’s heart.”
She winks at him, “I think I can handle it.”
“Right, well the third door down on your left would be your new home and I will have Dell bring in all your paperwork. Then we can get rolling. I have some new patients for you this afternoon if you are up for it.”
“Definitely.” Casually taking long steps on her black heels she makes her way to her office leaving Sam behind to converse with Dell. She walks inside and takes a look around. It is assuredly larger than her office in Seattle and actually has a view. A rush of eagerness runs over her and she can’t wait to get back into work. Maybe here she can find the reasons why she became a doctor in the first place again.
~-~-~-~-~-~
“You better buck up before the chief beats your ass, and if he doesn’t I will.” Miranda comments while staring up at the board.
“Leave me alone.”
“I’m serious here Sloan. Your annoying ass has been so melancholy and calm that even the board thinks that you need Prozac.”
“I do not. Why is the board talking about me anyway? Richard made his choice for chief and left me out of it entirely.”
She shrugs, “Don’t know. Just what I heard. Work on it because she isn’t coming back.” She turns on her stubby legs and heads for her new batch of interns preparing her lungs for full blown yelling.
“She is right you know.” Another voice pops up beside him. This time belonging to the one and only hair-eater extraordinaire.
“Why can’t you all stop? It isn’t her. It is me. I’m sick.” He fakes a cough and continues on. “I don’t feel well so forgive me for saving all of my energy for my surgeries.”
“You get crabby when she isn’t around. I talked to her-”
“I don’t care.”
“Oh, you do too. Anyway I talked to her yesterday and she said that today is her first day and she is going to call me and tell me how it went. I bet she would like to hear from you after a day like this.” Torres offers.
“No she wouldn’t. Why don’t you go find your annoying husband and talk his ear off?” He turns around and runs directly into Stevens. She is nice to look at on a normal day but he no longer feels the urge. “Uh. Sorry. Dr. Stevens…..”
“My fault Dr. Sloan” He runs off leaving her with Callie. “What is his deal lately? I mean I know he can’t be upset by the whole Burke running away thing so-”
“I am not your friend. Did you forget?” And with that Callie stalks off.
~-~-~-~-~-~
“Dr. Montgomery your next patient is in the waiting room.” Dell states while poking his head inside the open door.
“Thanks.” She smiles and straightens herself out before following him. She grabs the new chart off the counter looking over the name she can’t quite place but has an ominous feeling about. Placing the chart under her left arm and against her side she makes her way to the waiting area and calls out, “Mrs. Vechio?”
Rising the woman carefully places a hand on her back and then reaches down and grasps her purse before looking up and stating with rather obvious disdain, “Addison.”
“Reagan.” She manages as her heart sinks into her stomach. “Please come right this way, I…uh. I-I have some things I need you to fill out before we begin.”
The younger woman laughs and makes her way over to her doctor’s presence. “Right. Whatever you say Dr. Montgomery-Shepherd.”
Smiling about the dig on her marital status Addison remains quiet and escorts the red-headed woman to her office before taking one last deep breath and entering. Today was going to be so much harder than she originally thought.
~-~-~-~-~-~
He wasn’t pleased to have new interns. He wasn’t pleased to have a resident blabbering beside him, and he most certainly wasn’t pleased with his entire life. His patience was wearing thin as he began his first strokes of the long stitch line.
“So they said he walked out on her.” The brunette clamors while standing unsteadily.
“It’s true. I saw the whole thing. And then he left, and she left, and Meredith. That’s Dr. Grey to you left, and now here we are. Haven’t seen him in days. I think he really is gone. Don’t you find that weird? I mean who runs away from their own wedding like that?”
I can think of a few people Mark thinks before adding, “Hey Stevens, you think you could bring it down a few octaves before you wake Mrs. Flannigan here.” The room explodes in a series of giggles and Izzie blushes slightly.
“Sorry Dr. Sloan. I will keep it down.”
“Thanks.” He adds while continuing on with his break-neck pace.
~-~-~-~-~-~
“So what are you doing out here in sunny L.A.? I thought you were off in the land of torrential downpours with your unaffectionate husband.” The woman plays while taking a seat in front of her desk.
Addison ignoring her ever annoying existence rounds her wooden desk and takes a seat on the other side before rifling through for the papers she needs her to sign.
“So are you going to answer me? Or are you going to go on pretending we have nothing to do with each other’s lives? Because the latter part I have really enjoyed the last few years. Nice that some people can still keep me versed on what is going on in your life since you don’t care to share at all.”
Trying not to be rattled Addison sets the papers down in front of her with a pen and ask, “Please read through these and sign your consent down at the bottom and then we can go ahead and get started.”
“You aren’t going to answer me?”
“Rea, I have other patients today so I really need to get this appointment moving. I am sure you understand, or wait no I guess you wouldn’t.”
“Fine. Pull your snotty Addison remarks, why don’t you?”
“I’m not. And that is a disgusting image.” She points to the paper. “Here, you missed one.”
“Fine not snotty how about spoiled inconsiderate brat? Does that work out better in your head?”
Placing her head in her hands she simply replies, “Please Reagan not today. I have zero tolerance and it is my first day. I would really like to keep my new job-”
“First day? You just moved down here without bothering to call? Not that you have bothered within the last ten years to care what is going on with me-”
“Stop. Just stop.” She pulls the papers back and flips through them making sure everything is in order. “Go to exam room 3 right around the corner and I will meet you there. The gown is hanging up, you know the drill.”
“A little too well where you are concerned I am afraid.” She smirks at her obvious victory in this battle and heads for the door.
Addison tightens her fists and clenches her teeth while forcing out a smile. “I’ll be right in.” On all of the days, in all of the towns she really wishes that it wasn’t that woman who was her first patient. Although she did have a point. If only she would have stayed in touch she could have avoided this whole mess.
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