Glorfie Stardust: A History

For my own amusement.

glorfind3l
Created February 13, 2002
First updated February 14, 2002
Updated a second time March 2, 2002 ( Read more... )

And now, a word from our sponsors.


( Read more... )

( Read more... )

*sets up mini-minefield in yard in preparation for Trick-or-Treaters*

*dons zombie costume, freaks the fuck out of Celeborn, changes into a simple mask, freaks the fuck out of the kids*

*carves pumpkins with family unit*
( Photo )

Orcs. In the living room. With my children in the care of a harpymander. Yes, I understand that she's a very nice harpymander, but that doesn't change the fact that her skin smoulders at a temperature upwards of 300°F. Not exactly babysitter material, unless you begat a fucking Balrog ( Read more... )

( Read more... )

We're still unpacking, and the apartment still smells like orc. What a fucking beautiful way to start things off. Sauron claims that the smell is from an "unfortunate incident" involving a drunken party of yrch breaking into empty apartments in the Barad-dûr complex, but I hold to the theory that he just took out all the Glade Plug-Ins the real ( Read more... )

We had a hobbitbaby visit us for a while earlier, too. Hehe. Bilbo's a great little kid, he doesn't cry about the decorations in the garden like the whiners we have next door. Easy to please, too. Incredible how many pancakes that child can consume in a day. I left a few voicemails for the Gamgees, but no one returned my calls and now the bug ( Read more... )

So, yeah, we're moving to Mordor to get away from the neighbors bitching about the legality of discharging firearms on a suburban street (a bunch of Mormons, one bullet apiece, I fail to see what all the fuss was about) and how the skulls-- which Celeborn VERY METICULOUSLY boiled and cleaned; we have children in the house, after all-- and black ( Read more... )

*mildly deranged laughter* AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA VICTORY!

Yes, my friends, the butterflies are no more. The yard is littered with sizzling butterfly bits. Mua ha ha ha. Celeborn is so glad to see them gone (he still resents the loss of his goblin and psychic teddy bear) that he's choosing to ignore the fact that the pesticide ( Read more... )