I have fully embraced the reality that Marvin somewhat resembles (a young) Kiefer Sutherland a la Young Guns and Lost Boys. Full embracement here...and reasonably so.
Kiefer circa late 1980's:


( Read more... )

 I want to get a camera.
A nice one.

Hmmmmm.............

Still dont know what I want to do with my life.

 Oh how I wish I could blame all these songs about rain.

I need to do something.
It makes me mad. I make me mad.
All this time I have been jealous, and angry.
And I knwo my anger is only because of me. Maybe I should direct it that way, make it a little more constructive.
Urgg...
I am going to study and take a test set for next week online, and do the ( Read more... )

What do you do about something that you can have..but presently shouldn't?
I dont know... just bein a girl I suppose.
OMG OMG
I need to dye my effin hair. 
tomorrow I am going to go job hunting.
if I get one marvin is either going to buy me a bus pass or transfer to the nacogdoches store so I can take his car..although I think he's going to transfer ( Read more... )

 God, I feel sick and fucking nervous ( Read more... )

God, I feel really good lately. Well, I do and dont.
I mean, I still feel kinda crappy but I got to thinking and once I realized what was going on and that I didn't have to comply, it was like a weight was lifted off of my chest.. like my heart could beat more freely and my lungs could breathe less restricted. I feel much better not talking to ( Read more... )

All I think about sometimes is how much time I've wasted.

I know I'm only 20 but still.. I have wasted too much time. I knwo I was not a mature 16 yr old in the slightest and I shouldn't have been pushed to start college when I knew good and well I was not ready.
But did that matter to my dad? No, he doesn't give a shit about anything that won't ( Read more... )

 Sittin Out here on the hood of this truck looking up ( Read more... )

Sometimes I  stare at old pictures of myself and wonder what the fuck happened to me.
I mean.. with everything.
I actually miss being 16. That normally does not happen.
I miss the way things were with my friends. We could hang out on broadway because we didn't have jobs, and nothing really mattered. We seemed so ... "Who gives a fuck" and now that I ( Read more... )

 I sit full of feelings.
Like a kettle full of bubbling, boiling water.
Not anger.. there's no anger.
Oh girl, I am full of lust and jealousy.
Lust for your beauty
Jealousy for my lackings.