Xmas Presents from Samus 2010 [action]
[Samus is admittedly not feeling a whole lot of Christmas Cheer this year and many people are getting a bottle of space booze as a result. Said booze contains a bright neon blue liquid and looks like something you probably should not drink. It tastes like something you should probably not drink rapidly. Unless you are man enough.]
Gifts From Samus, To:
Jeff: While the firehouse is not very from the school, it is not exactly close either slugging all that laundry back and forth must be a pain so Samus feels that warrants a large box of hand-picked scrap parts. However, it seems to consist of specifically two types of scraps; Bicycle parts and Elysian Robot parts. Have fun, kiddo.
Ghor: Please to have a wifi adapter for your crazy cyborg self if you even NEED IT? So you can internet on the go. Just plug it in uh... wherever... you stick your things.
Char: Samus was very tempted to get Char a jar of authentically crappy tasting War Wasp royal jelly but that shit is expensive. Maybe a regular ol' beeswax candle will suffice. She is 65% sure you'll have no problems operating it.
Surge: Do you like moderately-priced space booze? Now you do.
Kyle: You are getting two bottles. One for your birthday and one for your Christmas.
Leon: Your space booze is in very sharp glass that just happens to shatter very easily.
Lighter: Gay scarfs. Everyone is getting a bottle of space booze.
Snake: Yeah, you too. Also an eye patch.
Weavile: Except you. You are getting tea.
Bowser: One guaranteed punch in the face come January 25th.
Kamek: You too, just because of association. Right in the face.
Giovanni: An unmarked envelope. Inside contains exactly $3.50. How mysterious.
Falcon's Mom: As usual, she is getting a card. And then I realized she was the only lady-type on this entire list. SOB.
Falcon: You are always the THE MOST CHALLENGING PERSON to shop for. When Falcon returns he may find Samus passed out face-first into the couch in her skivvies, her arm dangled over the side of the cushion and half-clutching an empty bottle of an alcoholic something something. The TV is on, playing whatever Christmas specials are airing and there is an opened bottle of chaser pills on the table. It looks like someone either had a really rough night or a really awesome night. If he looks around the rest of the firehouse, he may find Ionia's room has been repainted at request and the now white room is in the beginning stages of becoming a spare room; A couch, a few boxes and some other odds and ends have been moved in there to help fill it in. Any of Ionia's drawings have been carefully removed from the refrigerator and have been stored in one of these boxes, as well as the door-sign with her name on it. In effort to make the very bare refrigerator look less so it has been COVERED IN RED AND GREEN STICKY NOTES. All are blank, spare one in the center and to it is duck-taped the plug-end of some Christmas lights leading who-knows-where.
"You light up my life." The note says. If Falcon dares to plug it in and IF HE DARES TO FOLLOW THIS TRAIL OF CHRISTMAS LIGHTS, it will lead him to the base of one of the fire poles. There, is a tub of turtle wax for his dumb bike that is totally going to lose to hers in their dumb race. Alternatively, it may also go on the Blue Falcon if he so desires. The light spirals up the fire pole and winds over to the base of the stairs.
Up the stairs and to the roof, the lights wrap around the final present... a finished hot tub, complete with hologram TV. Why would anyone ever want to leave the hot tub seriously. She probably does not want him to use it but there is a bottle of bubble bath. For. Whenever.
Needless to say, there is also a lot of space booze in the 'fridge and whenever she wakes up there will probably be a million snuggles.
Gifts to Samus, From:
Goose: Heck yeah, booze!
Amp: A screwdriver handle + a sticky note with Amp's idea/notes to use it as a gun handle.
Jeff: Cookies. Falcon ate them all.
Daisy: Cookies & Candy Canes. Falcon ate them all. FALCON.
Sable: One [1] black hat.
Char: One [1] jar of Sinnoh sweet honey. Now with 99% less space bees. FALCON ATE IT ALL.
Leon: A reflector, imported scented candles, and a restaurant gift certificate.
Bowser: A mug that says "#1 teacher" on it with a note that says "thank you for being such a nice teacher" but with no name. The mug is actually ensorcelled. After a month it turns into… a Faberge egg.
Kirby: One [1] tomato.
Slippy: Chocolate truffles and peppermints but Falcon ate them all.
Kamek: Two bags of bird seed with a bomb-omb hidden inside of them. They were used as target practice.
Max: Those protein bars you gave Falcon that he didn't eat.
Lucas: BLUE FIRE SCARF.
Bulba: Oatmeal chocolate chip cookies. AND THEY WEREN'T COMPLETELY EATEN BY COOKIE MONSTER FALCON.
Lash: Chocolate eggs that were probably eaten by Falcon, bike polish, and a modified red helmet for motorbikin'. It probably shoots lasers.
Kyle: Turtle wax and a bottle of bourbon, aw yeah.
Gifts From Samus, To:
Jeff: While the firehouse is not very from the school, it is not exactly close either slugging all that laundry back and forth must be a pain so Samus feels that warrants a large box of hand-picked scrap parts. However, it seems to consist of specifically two types of scraps; Bicycle parts and Elysian Robot parts. Have fun, kiddo.
Ghor: Please to have a wifi adapter for your crazy cyborg self if you even NEED IT? So you can internet on the go. Just plug it in uh... wherever... you stick your things.
Char: Samus was very tempted to get Char a jar of authentically crappy tasting War Wasp royal jelly but that shit is expensive. Maybe a regular ol' beeswax candle will suffice. She is 65% sure you'll have no problems operating it.
Surge: Do you like moderately-priced space booze? Now you do.
Kyle: You are getting two bottles. One for your birthday and one for your Christmas.
Leon: Your space booze is in very sharp glass that just happens to shatter very easily.
Lighter: Gay scarfs. Everyone is getting a bottle of space booze.
Snake: Yeah, you too. Also an eye patch.
Weavile: Except you. You are getting tea.
Bowser: One guaranteed punch in the face come January 25th.
Kamek: You too, just because of association. Right in the face.
Giovanni: An unmarked envelope. Inside contains exactly $3.50. How mysterious.
Falcon's Mom: As usual, she is getting a card. And then I realized she was the only lady-type on this entire list. SOB.
Falcon: You are always the THE MOST CHALLENGING PERSON to shop for. When Falcon returns he may find Samus passed out face-first into the couch in her skivvies, her arm dangled over the side of the cushion and half-clutching an empty bottle of an alcoholic something something. The TV is on, playing whatever Christmas specials are airing and there is an opened bottle of chaser pills on the table. It looks like someone either had a really rough night or a really awesome night. If he looks around the rest of the firehouse, he may find Ionia's room has been repainted at request and the now white room is in the beginning stages of becoming a spare room; A couch, a few boxes and some other odds and ends have been moved in there to help fill it in. Any of Ionia's drawings have been carefully removed from the refrigerator and have been stored in one of these boxes, as well as the door-sign with her name on it. In effort to make the very bare refrigerator look less so it has been COVERED IN RED AND GREEN STICKY NOTES. All are blank, spare one in the center and to it is duck-taped the plug-end of some Christmas lights leading who-knows-where.
"You light up my life." The note says. If Falcon dares to plug it in and IF HE DARES TO FOLLOW THIS TRAIL OF CHRISTMAS LIGHTS, it will lead him to the base of one of the fire poles. There, is a tub of turtle wax for his dumb bike that is totally going to lose to hers in their dumb race. Alternatively, it may also go on the Blue Falcon if he so desires. The light spirals up the fire pole and winds over to the base of the stairs.
Up the stairs and to the roof, the lights wrap around the final present... a finished hot tub, complete with hologram TV. Why would anyone ever want to leave the hot tub seriously. She probably does not want him to use it but there is a bottle of bubble bath. For. Whenever.
Needless to say, there is also a lot of space booze in the 'fridge and whenever she wakes up there will probably be a million snuggles.
Gifts to Samus, From:
Goose: Heck yeah, booze!
Amp: A screwdriver handle + a sticky note with Amp's idea/notes to use it as a gun handle.
Jeff: Cookies. Falcon ate them all.
Daisy: Cookies & Candy Canes. Falcon ate them all. FALCON.
Sable: One [1] black hat.
Char: One [1] jar of Sinnoh sweet honey. Now with 99% less space bees. FALCON ATE IT ALL.
Leon: A reflector, imported scented candles, and a restaurant gift certificate.
Bowser: A mug that says "#1 teacher" on it with a note that says "thank you for being such a nice teacher" but with no name. The mug is actually ensorcelled. After a month it turns into… a Faberge egg.
Kirby: One [1] tomato.
Slippy: Chocolate truffles and peppermints but Falcon ate them all.
Kamek: Two bags of bird seed with a bomb-omb hidden inside of them. They were used as target practice.
Max: Those protein bars you gave Falcon that he didn't eat.
Lucas: BLUE FIRE SCARF.
Bulba: Oatmeal chocolate chip cookies. AND THEY WEREN'T COMPLETELY EATEN BY COOKIE MONSTER FALCON.
Lash: Chocolate eggs that were probably eaten by Falcon, bike polish, and a modified red helmet for motorbikin'. It probably shoots lasers.
Kyle: Turtle wax and a bottle of bourbon, aw yeah.