The sign on the utility pole reads "Just Married Garage Sale - Sat. and Sun. 8-4 ( Read more... )

I'm drinking water that has been INFUSED WITH ELECTROLYTES! So, that's a good thing, right? They will make me a super hero of fantabulous proportions, right? This water will cure all manner of diseases and mental defects through a simple infusion process, right? It will make that spot on my belly stop itching, right? Because that is driving me ( Read more... )

I think the Welsh might just be fucking with us. From a story about how a couple in Wales is using a barn owl as a ring bearer at their wedding ( Read more... )

Last night my brain tried to make the act of being reunited (and it feels so good!) into a reunitement. No wonder I'm no good at Boggle. I'm wondering if I'd be better at a version, the point of which is to find combinations of letters that are almost words. Things that should be words or could be words, but aren't. I bet I would kick ass at ( Read more... )

It turns out that I'm bad at Boggle. Like bad in a way that is humiliating, comic, and slightly bewildering, given that I know words. I'd never played before Saturday night and, well, it's unlikely that I will ever play again. Seriously, I know words, lots of them, but I can't seem to see them arranged in that little square. My brain has a ( Read more... )

I took some cough medicine last night for which the maximum dosage is 2 teaspoons, but the little plastic cup has a mark for 3 teaspoons. Why would they need that mark? Are they just assuming people will ignore the dosage instructions and take 50% more cough medicine than directed? And they are enabling that behavior why? Oh, Delsym, wouldn't ( Read more... )

Derek and I had a stupid argument this morning and I am right and I need validation from my peeps. I can't even believe we were arguing about this. The girls wanted orange juice and we were out in the refrigerator upstairs. Derek went to the refrigerator downstairs to get a new carton. I mentioned that he should give them apple juice because ( Read more... )

I spent the weekend in California and Saturday afternoon was devoted to the spa. Michelle and I treated ourselves to a massage and body polish. I had my massage first and, as with all massages, I had two goals. The first, of course, is to avoid farting. The second is to relax. The relaxing is more difficult when you can't seem to turn off your ( Read more... )

It seems that I angered the baseball gods by having faith in my team. I knew better, but I just couldn't help it. They were so cute and hopeful. Being at the game last night was pretty cool (there were F-16s!) despite the outcome. The best thing ever, though, was this morning's wrap-up of the series on NPR ( Read more... )

I'm still in shock that the Rockies are going to the World Series and I helped by not watching any of the games. The networks have to be salivating over the very likely (Sorry, Andersons) possibility of a Colorado-Cleavland matchup. Seriously, what a dream come true for advertisers everywhere, considering that most people on the coasts can't even ( Read more... )