HA!

[joancrawford]

I simply LOVE being a SMASHING success! I CAN'T SEEM TO RUB IT IN ENOUGH!! HAHAHAAA!
CAROLANNE!!!
BRING ME ANOTHER DRINK!!

HEY, YOU! YEAH, I'M TALKING TO YOU, talulahbankrupt....YOU'RE UGLY!! HAHAHAAA!

MY NAME'S J.C. AND I'M THE QUEEN OF MEAN
DON'T FUCK WITH ME, OR I'LL TEAR OUT YOUR SPLEEN!!!

IT'S SIMPLY WONDERFUL BEING THE QUEEN OF HOLLYWOOD!

Love, J.C.

Comments

[durga_daggr]

long live the queen!

Re:

[joancrawford]

AMEN!

[thecollective]

We are the Borg. You will be assimilated. Lower your shields and surrender your ships. We will add your biological and technological distinctiveness to our own. Your culture will adapt to service us. Your future is with us.

Resistance is futile.

Re:

[joancrawford]

MY ASS IT IS! I'M THE GODDAMN QUEEN OF MOTHERFUCKING HOLLYWOOD!!! SCREW YOU, OGRE!!

[tinacrawford]

I'm glad to see that your in high spirits today mommie! I see your Effexor has kicked in. :-D
But... Theres some.... Difficult news, I'm afraid.
MR. MAYOR wants you to come in to his office first thing tomorrow morning. Carol Anne was crying when she got off the phone with his secretary. I think she's hiding something. Be on the look out, Mommie.
Love always,
Tina Crawford

[harriet_brindle]

Hey you're really good at making rhymes! One time the Lawson's went to Hollywood and saw all the stars. I wonder if you met them.

I bet you'd remember Jamie. He's such a hunk!

I love Jamie!

Re:

[joancrawford]

What the fuck are you talking about, little girl?
Love, J.C.

[harriet_brindle]

I don't want to sound rude Miss Crawfish, but how old are you? You look older than my grandmother, and she's been dead for five years.

One time Jamie, Vicky and I all helped out at an old folks home. It was for a project at school. All the old people smelled bad. Like they were hiding rotten fruit in their pants. A couple of the ladies there talked about you an awful lot. I think one was your daughter.

I love Jamie!

Re:

[joancrawford]

EAT SHIT YOU LITTLE HUSSY! HOW DARE YOU SPEAK TO ME THAT WAY? MAYBE IF YOUR MOTHER DISCIPLINED YOU MORE, YOU'D HAVE LESS OF A SHARP TONGUE, GIRL!

[drbrucebanner]

Miss Crawford, I must say I'm quite a big fan of yours.

But I think you need to calm down a bit. Lord knows that it's good to keep a cool head. Bad things happen to me when I get mad.

I have a short fuse.

Re:

[joancrawford]

NOBODY TELLS THE QUEEN OF HOLLYWOOD WHAT TO DO, YOU TWO BIT DOCTOR!
I LOVE ALL MY FANS!
Love, J.C.

[drbrucebanner]

Joan, I was merely making a suggestion. When I get angry, things happen. I'm the type to try and keep people calm....HEADACHE.....erg.....TWO BIT DOCTOR!??!?! HEADACHE!!! I'M A TWO BIT DOCTOR???

ROOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[drbrucebanner]

HULK
SMASH!!!!!

Hi Joan

[billybarty]

Like you, I am also deceased. I swore I saw you a few times in the afterlife. It's neat that us dead people can still do journals!

Re: Hi Joan

[joancrawford]

Why, hello to you too! Well, you see, I never actually died. I was cryogenically frozen, and the essence of diva itself, my consciousness was transferred into a perfect cybernetic body!
HA! TRY TO COMPETE WITH THIS, TINA!!!
Love, J.C.