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And yet again...
Today would b one of those days where I just am not happy. This roller-coaster that my emotions have me on is really starting to take a toll on me. It was great that day Josh helped out but he hasn't done anything since then. I just rrally want to give up hope that he wl ever change. We have more bad days than we do good days. It really upsets ( Read more... ) -
(Untitled)
So I'm feeling a little bit better today. Sometimes I just don't know what gets into me. There are days where I literally think nothing will ever make me happy but then there are days like today where I'm pretty content w my life... Josh cleaned most of the house on his days off and cooked dinner and baked a cake. And he has been taking care of ( Read more... ) -
Hmm
Going through some of my old posts and it just seems that I always talk about the same things. I'm still depressed. Josh and i broke up for awhile because i wasnt happy and had feelings for someone else. That didn't work out because he was too young and just too much for me. Sometimes I wonder y I try to b w Josh. He says he is gonna change ( Read more... ) -
(Untitled)
i just need to vent right now. i always feel so empty inside. i don't really know why. i shouldn't. i have my baby that's all i should need. but josh just makes me feel like i'm missing something. he just doesn't get how i feel. most of the time it seems like he doesn't even care that i'm upset. i guess i'm just gonna get up and go to work ( Read more... ) -
baby
Josh and I welcomed baby Aurora Jo Seaver on March 30, 2010 at 2:29 pm. She weighed 6 lbs 13 oz and measured 19 1/2 inches in length. We went to the hospital at 6:30 pm on the 29th to be induced. They inserted this capsule thing into my cervix to soften it up some time after 8. My friends mom was the nurse in charge that night, so I was talking ( Read more... ) -
my my my
Well, I guess since Kelley updated hers, I should update mine as well. lol So what's been going on in the last 10 months of my life you ask? Well, Josh and I did get back together. Quite strange one would think since the last entry said I was completely over him. I guess we all lie to try to make ourselves feel better. We are actually expecting ( Read more... ) -
heh
It's funny looking back on old entries... wow how stupid i was!I can't believe everything i said in those entries! ha it's entertaining though. but in other news.. I am doing absolutely fantabulous! I am happy. I'm doing well at work. I'm talking to someone. And I am completely over Josh. I think that's the biggest accomplishment i've made. ( Read more... ) -
anger
So, i'm sure that everyone remembers the episode of the oc where summer is going thru her grieving stages... well.. i'm to the anger part.. lots and lots of anger right now. If i could find someone to shank.. i would shank a bitch right now. I'm trying so hard and getting absolutely no where. I need a way to let my anger out.. but i'm not sure ( Read more... ) -
pain
So now i'm on vacation for the next 8 days... so now i get to sit around the house and just hurt. You know I have guys that are interested in me.. but I don't want to be with them. like the other night... definitely could have gotten laid.. but I didn't.. because i felt like i would be cheating on josh...turns out he doesn't care what i do.. who ( Read more... ) -
well..
i think it's over for good. Josh said a lot of mean and hurtful things to me last night. so i just gotta suck it up and move on. I don't want to... but he wants me to. i'm in more pain that i was at the beginning of this whole ordeal... now it's time to selfmedicate...