[NVC Day 29] -- [Captain's Personal (Mono)log(ue)]
Soon, the place they had called 'home' for a month would be light years behind them, just captured in memories and photographs and records. Things would be left behind, things would be taken. Not just the physical things, but so many mental things, and worse, people. So many of the people that Jim had come to know would be either be staying behind on the planet, transferred to new ships, or would be on the last day or two of transport to the Starbase where things had all began.
Jim sat on the beach, toes smushed into the wet sand, staring at the sunrise reflecting off the warm sea waters. It reminded him of Risa in a lot of ways, except Risa seemed almost cool compared to Sha'Kwai's constant heat and it hadn't rained once in the month they had been there. He wondered how it would be different, without many of the displaced people staying behind. It was too early in the morning to try to remember those that were.
He hadn't seen Sam in days, and even a little nosy peek around had revealed Sam wasn't only not there, he hadn't been for a while. Maybe Sam had played it cool and was really freaked out by what had happened. The idea of Sam, who while he had a temper didn't nearly have one to match his, being freaked out a little made Jim laugh quietly to himself. Maybe they were more alike than expected, even being brothers.
He had thought a lot about Sam's words that day when they had woken up together, when Jim had definitely freaked out, his fight with Bones... he hated that fight. Every part of him did. Not like couples didn't fight, but not normally like that. There was a lot of him that didn't understand things that was happening between the three of them, a lot of confused feelings, but... Sam had said that they had shared Bones without a problem. It had been fun (even if when morals kicked back in slightly wrong) and... Sam had a good point. They had shared Bones. Jim looked down at the sand, trying to remember more, understand it, but time was starting to fuzz things into half-memory.
Didn't matter after all.
He and Bones had done a lot since then. Come together in powerful ways to learn about the bond, about shielding. Something going on with Sybok... Jim couldn't entirely put his finger on it though, and he wouldn't ask Bones about it unless Bones wanted to talk. Then Sybok wanted to join them on the ship...
He rubbed his brow, and smiled. Maybe, just maybe, things were coming together. Spock would have his brother, which was good for the two of them Jim was pretty sure. Bones would keep Sam as his yeoman... and... share him. Was it possible? Was it really possible? If it made Bones happy... If it made Bones happy. Share him. They would all need to talk. Calmly, without any liquor involved, and figure it out. That'd be nice, or at least helpful, once they were back out in space and things were starting to look more like normal again.
His dad was going to get married to Christopher Pike of all people. Asked him to officate. That meant learning what he was supposed to say over these things, and Jim made a mental note to do it. The concept of them getting married still made his head swim but Jim approved of it. It made him think of his mother, sending a little twinge through his chest. He had thought... that after what had happened, when he was a kid again... that maybe they could be closer. How she had protected him...
Jim smiled sadly. Wasn't meant to be, it seemed. Too much past not just between him and her, but between her and George. If it made her happy to be elsewhere, all he could do was wish her the best and put it behind him. He had lived more than ten years without her, without knowing her voice, he could do another ten years. Still, he had her comm number safe and secure in his PADD. A note now and then... maybe she could manage that? He'd find out in a while, when he found out her assignment on another ship.
He stood up, dusting sand off his robe, and started to walk indoors.
While the idea of going to a baby shower didn't settle well with his manhood nor his mood after having talked to her, that didn't mean he didn't care about what she was going through, and the little girl that would, sort of indirectly, be the only one to ever carry on the Kirk name. His gift had been small and came with a set of pens to actually use it. He couldn't wrap to save his damn life, so he didn't bother. He hoped it would be okay, to her tastes. It took only a bit of quick hackery the night of the babyshower to get into her room and leave it laying on her bed with a little note so she could find it come morning.
Tina,
Keep every memory alive long after it's been lived. Sometimes, a physical reminder can be a thousand times more powerful than any image on a PADD.
JTK
Indoors, he stripped of his robe and took a fast shower, then pulled on some comfortable clothing. While he had a chance, he was going to go buy a few things and have them taken up to the ship. Reports had come in that the last of his requested changes to the ship had been finished. For the sake of his crew, he wanted it to be home, and a damn well comfortable home, for the next five years.
The changes were small but many. Larger beds - at least queen - in each quarters. It had taken some design work, but that was why everyone was supposed to take everything of theirs. He had put in a got a request for some very specialized medical officers to be added to Bones' line of nurses to replace Chapel and Chapel. New technology since the Enterprise had been made had been added. Every replicator and transporter was functioning at normal, and the replicators had thousands of new choices in apparel, food, and drink. The bar was under way - not in a rec room as he had first thought, but instead in an observation deck like Bones had suggested (a damn good suggestion at that). Jim had gotten a report about the sheer amount of liquor Guinan had managed on five thousand credits and was damn well pleased by it; he liked her already.
With a little smile on his lips, feeling good about the day, Jim left his room and went to go see what he wanted to take back to his home in the stars.