So been to a competition today.
Im still alive...obviously. Went to my friends birthday party last night...was a really good night...just got drunk really. Was slightly hungover this morning but nothing too bad. I weighed this morning too...no lax, a takeaway and lots of wine, due on period = 1.5kg gain in a day...what a joke.  What a fucking joke. ( Read more... )

So I went to my groups. Well didnt go to the first...just sat with my friend and had coffee.

I spoke to the OT who runs them...told them how I was feeling etc. Was very open with her. She called the CMHT and they
have decided that the crisis team need to be involved although im thinking very differently. They dont help me whatsoever so dont see the ( Read more... )

Struggled finding somewhere to have lunch. Walked in and out of places etc...I feel I have been here before

The urge to sh or to OD is getting unbearable. I need to talk to someone maybe. I dont know...there is nothing anyone can do. I dont want to hurt people but I really really dont know how much longer I can hang around in this world for. I hate ( Read more... )

So today has been ok. Its actually gone quite quickly :).

Went to rambling this morning. It was ok...bit boring and this guy was chatting shite to me all the way round and I just wanted to be alone grrr. Oh well!! I then had appointment with the OT to sort out the groups im doing. Its an acute service so staying there for just 3 more weeks and then ( Read more... )

Ugh facebook is annoying me...it keeps crashing and its all funny...like wierd colours etc :S looks abit like a film negative!!!

I had planned to fast from today but due to being EDNOS I got hungry ;) lol. No seriously, fasting isnt going to help my metabolim what so ever so just had a restricting diet instead.

Ive got to go to weald groups tomorrow ( Read more... )

Im not sure what else I wanted my CPN to do but I needed her to do something. She asked me what i thought about the crisis team and said that Im not needing them now but maybe in the near future if I continue being so low. I said no again, im really not sure what they can do for me...if anything. I dont know what ANYONE can do for me.

I just keep ( Read more... )

Going into London to meet katie today :). we are going to the cinema to watch 'The Help' as Katie is still not very well so doesnt want to be walking or drinking too much ;). Really looking forward to it...not seen her since bfore I went into hospital which must mean its been a couple of months now...faaaaaaaaaaaaar too long!! Need to get a new ( Read more... )

Just had a pizza from pizza hut. Not feeling as guilty as would normally as asked for half cheese so mainly just veg on it really.

Weight was back to 50.4 this morn...very much doubt it will have stayed the same...fucking pizza. Oh well, will just restrict tomorrow although I know that just screws with my metabolism but makes me feel better for it.

( Read more... )

So I didnt fast in the end. That was a stupid idea and shouldnt have been followed. I did however restrict. Oh well...at least I had something.

Went ok with docs. They have stopped pregabalin and going to put me on mirtazapine. Im not sure how I feel about it as I know it can cause u to have an increased appetite. I shall see how things go though. ( Read more... )

Updating on my phone hence no pinkness and not going to be very long!

Went to old dance school...teacher text me saying she needed me to go so unfortunately couldnt go to check out the new one. I will hopefully get chance to go next week or the week after maybe.

Ive eaten too much today...nearly 1500...really going to have gained from this so wont ( Read more... )