Home? Home. What is home? I don’t actually want to go home, HOME. I want to go to some place that’s going to wrap me in comfort like a womb. I want my mommy, but I don’t want MY mommy because frankly I don’t like that cold, loving denying bitch all that much. No I want the ideal of a mommy that smells like lavender and peppermint and makes me ( Read more... )

Bitch in the office across from my own is speaking to someone and totally brought up the Jean Grae issue (thinking I had already left for the day). I've reiterated the Jean Grae issue just to refresh everyone's minds on my issues (or maybe non-issues). Maybe I'm not wrong. Maybe people really DO hate me. Oh shit. Paranoia! Paranoia ( Read more... )

I've suddenly gotten this horrible paranoia that nobody likes me. And this not fishing for love. I don't need a hundred comments saying 'we love you. we love you.' It's just this weird sort pervasive feeling that either people aren’t going to respond to my calls, e-mails, etc. or on the work side that whenever I say something people are just ( Read more... )

This is disturbing to me because I can’t really locate my current state of being. Since I’m so cerebral and removed my therapist often encourages me to try to limit myself to thinking in terms of feelings (in “normal world” this is relatively definitive and can usually be correlated to specific incidences “I feel sad because . . .”). ( Read more... )

I've agreed to go see the second part of Wagner's Ring Cycle starring Placido Domingo tomorrow night at the Met. A five hour opera with a boy I am some what ambivilant towards. I think this might be a mistake.

For the first time since the campaign began Kerry has pulled ahead http://www.electoral-vote.com/

As a frequent visitor of http://www.electoral-vote.com, I have to say today is the most positive day I've seen since this whole crazy election began. Kerry is trailing by less than ten electoral votes with a trillion states still undecided (though amazingly Florida finally looks more ( Read more... )

So I just dyed my hair black again (love it) and now I'm ready to go get it cut. Should I give it a blunt cut to just below my chin while leaving the bangs long, but shorter than the overall hair length and make the ends point (not blunt) to comb over and sweep into the rest of the hair? Or should I do layers again this time make sure that the ( Read more... )

At least that’s what my journalism teachers used to tell us. So in a LJ that I had intended just to encompass the weekend, but wasn’t finished quickly enough so now includes last weekend and bits of this week, let us progress to the first ever LJ in headlines ( Read more... )

I had weird dreams last night. My first dream I remember has something to do with speaking to Dizzee Rascal’s managers. They were asking me to fill out this long survey about Dizzee Rascal and his work. Their first question asked me to describe in detail one of Dizzee Rascal’s pictures of a bed and what I liked about it. And I remembered a bed ( Read more... )