As much as I know it won't prove true, I'm really ready to give up. Of course, I'll take him back the second he decides I'm important again and doesn't want to ignore me, but I'm about done. I don't understand how someone who loves me can viably do this to me. He's fallen off the face of the earth. He shows absolutely no interest in contacting me ( Read more... )

Let's see who can be more passive aggressive ( Read more... )

What I'm feeling is loneliness. I've very rarely recognized this feeling, because it hurts so much. Knowing people are "there"  for you is never as effective as having someone to be THERE for you. I need people closer to me in my life. I'm turning out to be much weaker than I thought. People so easily forget about me, ignore me, push me off to the ( Read more... )

Perhaps I just don't know the meaning of the word "over". I have trouble letting go. I'm in too deep to simply walk away at this point, but I can't continue to punish myself like this. I've taken too much responsibility for things I have absolutely no control over. His mental illness is not my fault, nor is it anything that even my best actions or ( Read more... )

Despite all the drama and garbage and incredibly hard things that have been going on, I haven't written about it. I'm reluctant to fully disclose what's been going on, and I don't know how to feel anyway. I never do, lately ( Read more... )

Well, it's not over yet. It's not all fixed yet. It looks like things are getting better, but we'll see. (Isn't that always how it is?) The only thing I know for sure is how I feel about him and that I will be there to help any way I can. I only hope that he remembers that fact and that I can make it clear to him. We aren't the most stable of ( Read more... )

I'd have to say that one of my favorite feelings in the world is when a weight is lifted. Relief- it's quite great. I think the important thing is to keep in mind what caused the relief, and to keep up on that path ( Read more... )

I'm completely scared. I'm so far away and I could lose him at any minute. I don't know what to do. No solution will fix everything. Most of the solutions will create other problems. I want to be there, but I can't. I am so incredibly scared and hurt. I feel helpless and useless ( Read more... )

This has tested me, made me crazy, and somehow brought out good in me. But it's not over. I'm afraid to be honest with anyone about it because I'm sure I will be judged for staying. I know I'm putting up with so much, but I can't leave now. I'm not going anywhere, and that's that. That's the way it's going to be. He needs someone to trust and it's ( Read more... )

A new page turns in the saga of my boyfriend and his incredibly stressful life. He's reacting poorly to everything. I don't know what to do. I don't know how to save him. I don't know what to say that can convince him that his life is worth living. I'm lost and hurt. I feel useless ( Read more... )