I spoke to Andre again yesterday. It wasnt that superficial 'hows it going' bullshit either. It was the 'i know i hurt you and im sorry' realness. It was kind of nice, i guess. I didnt say half of what ive wanted to say to him, but i think thats just because i'm over it. Plus, what good would it do now? He knows Im sorry, and I know he is. Thats ( Read more... )

i guess there are some things i will never understand.

i dont even know where to start on the matter at hand.

i will say nothing, and continue to fret and worry about things beyond my control.

i just wish i didnt care so much about how i make people feel.

i have enough guilt to start my own religion...

Feist is fantastic ( Read more... )

Just got home from Aidens about an hour ago. It was nice. i dont have much to say, i just wanted to update this ( Read more... )

Modest Mouse was infuckingcredible. Since i had never seen them live, or been to this particular venue, i really had no expectations. Things are usually better that way anyhow. i feel like you get more of an authentic experience... but they are seriously so amazing. They fulfill every musical craving i could ever have simultaneously. In them, i ( Read more... )

Christ. The drive here was killer. In a not so good way. Im at Wallys right now. He's showering before Adult Swim, so I figured Id take the time to update this puppy. It was seriously pouring the whole way here...like a muthafucka. I couldnt see a damn thing. It was hella dark and rainy. Then, as if shit wasnt frustrating enough, me being tired, ( Read more... )

I hate dreaming of Kev. Even in my dreams he is cold and unforgiving. How is it that I wake up so sad? Why does he weigh so heavy on my heart? I never ever have dreams of the two of us where things are untainted. Even in the exceptionally rare (but beautiful) dreams where he's the warm, kind person I try so hard to remember, I'm always some ( Read more... )

Yesterday was insanely fun. Aiden and I went to this three hour break dancing competition... man, those cats can dance. Seriously. I cant even begin to touch upon what made it so cool... it just felt really good to know that even the mid-west has people who are into that whole underground(if you can still say that) sort of sub-culture. I almost ( Read more... )

Our entanglement in thoughts and beliefs about ourselves, those around us, and the world makes it impossible to be where we are. It is like the Zen painter who finished a life-sized portrait of a tiger on the wall of his dwelling. Returning home lost in thought some days later, he was frightened upon suddenly seeing the tiger there, having ( Read more... )

So yeah, last night was ( Read more... )