I spoke to Kerry online just now. She seemed in better spirits. We shared laughs and then I don't know if she meant it, but she stuck the knife in at the end, or something. I told her I'd be thinking more intently about her tomorrow and she said "and all I had to do was take a test?"

I think I fucked up a bit with Joe. He called me last night, but I didn't feel like answering the phone. Caught him online today at 130pm and he asked if I wanted to come over tonight, said he'd call in 30mins, etc. I agreed, but felt that it was not really that long to spend catching up.. only a few hours. I don't know, really. I got cold feet. ( Read more... )

Kerry's stressed about her exam tomorrow. Amongst other inner crises. She says she been in limbo about so many things in the past few weeks. She's starting to dig. I'm sure I've not helped her preparation. She really needs to pass this exam to get on the road to teaching. And yes, she needs to pass so that our forthcoming conversations won't ( Read more... )

My lovely weekend of night shifts culminated in my car breaking down when driving home. All was fine until I went to drop from 5th to 4th and the gearstick went as limp as Pele's dick. I pull over as best I could and tried to avoid the pissed off faces of motorists forced to work their way around me. Cold, tired, waiting for the AA, standing ( Read more... )

There is something incredibly rewarding about working hard. Strenuous, physical, manual labour. To feel the rawness of your calloused hands, your heart pumping out of your ribcage, the sweat oozing from each and every pore. To flex every muscle, tighten every sinew and let your strategically taken breaths be your only release as the air grows thick ( Read more... )

hey ( Read more... )

Last night, I downloaded drivelikejehn's intriguing novel, The Lost Generation. It's not the final copy (minor tweaks here and there, I'm informed) and with a word count of over 50k, it's quite lengthy, but I'm planning to perservere with it. I was planning to print it out and read, but I don't think my printer has enough ink to pump out 50-60 pages (it had ( Read more... )

Sorry Stefan, my MSN is fucking me like a bitch tonight for some reason.

I have pissed away four days of time off. I didn't even go outside the house. I've just been drinking coffee, staying up all night and using the 'Net. I know I'm to blame, but the sense of missed opportunity is immense to me. To start to sort myself out. But I can't. Not now. Everything seems extremely futile. I spoke to Kerry on the phone last ( Read more... )

Just say no? I don't think so.

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