ever look back and realize you spent your whole life like a chicken with its head cut off? thats how i feel right now. i look back at high school and never liked who i was, i looked back at college and never liked who i was and i see myself now and dont like who i am. but its not as if i never achieved my goal of becoming who i wanted to become, it ( Read more... )

I always, always check to see if anyone is updating and they never do and then I remember that I never update so if I want someone else to update, then I better do it myself. I Can not WAIT until Christmas and New Years and everything is over. I have so much going on and so much stress until then that I just want to fast forward to January 2nd and ( Read more... )

Lately I've felt completely and utterly abandoned. I mean really if it weren't for my mom I probably wouldn't be sitting here right now. It just feels like I've lost mostly everything from my life, whether I'm on good or bad terms with someone they don't try to contact me anyway. So does it really matter if I'm friends or enemies with anyone? I ( Read more... )

i woke up this morning ( Read more... )

To anyone who actually reads this, hi. Sorry I haven't updated in awhile. Life's been a little much to deal with. I'm moving around Sept 1st with my mom. Ummm.... not really looking for a job. I'm more so looking for motivation to look for a job. I just don't know what I want to do or how to go about finding it. We'll see. Nothing much is really ( Read more... )

FIRSTS ( Read more... )

All I wanted when I came home from work tonight was my rice and my diet peach iced tea... and both were gone. Big surprise. Forget the fact that I had bought and made both of them myself and put them with the other food I had bought in the fridge... And I thought the night couldn't get much worse.

Ugh...one cold shower and I'm convinced my whole world is falling apart. I'm definitely in a 'don't mess with me' kind of mood. Get out of my way. Yesterday, while driving down to Fredonia for the first time of the day for my interview, I was in the best mood ever for pretty much no reason at all. It was a gorgeous day and I was going to a job ( Read more... )

So yeah...it's been awhile. Everytime I sit in front of the computer I want to update and I'll even go to the page and such but I just won't do it. Possibly because I don't even feel like discussing the state of mind I'm in right now. That and there's not much to talk about. I don't really talk to much of anyone, which I really didn't before I left ( Read more... )

Ugh...I hate the male species. Absolutely despise them. I need some advice so heres the story: On my birthday I met Paul out in Fredonia. I unfortunately had a lot to drink and got very sick. As we all know I get cudly when I'm drunk (don't we all) and he took care of me. Not a big deal right? We passed out on his couch...Ok see the big deal here? ( Read more... )