A day for me. 24 hours of no work, no school, just play and food and hair-dye and books, and wondering what I want. I don't know IF...I don't know WHEN...I am so unsure of some things right now. And my memories wax so lucid and sometimes it is obvious who I should want. Who I do want? Perhaps that's the way I should have written it. Things could ( Read more... )

I just had the weirdest dream. I was married, and my husband had a small penis. We were having sex in the shower of a double wide mobile home and he was wearing a condom. Then the water started to turn pink. Somebody had shot his dick with a nail gun. Three times! So we call the police and they tell us we have to leave and take some stuff with us. ( Read more... )

Whatever. don't call then. I feel much frustration. I can't elaborate, I wish I could. It feels like you don't care sometimes. Like you are just going through the motions. Not always, but sometimes I get the impression you only call because you know I want you to. Not because you want to. Like right now, if you didn't want to come over and meet my ( Read more... )

Oww my feet hurt. But my mind feels fine, and I'm not damp. I like being dry, it's nice to live in western civilized society. It's not nice to destroy the environment. It's nice to take adorable photos of people's children, especially when paid to do so. It's not nice when said parents are so damn picky and criticize said adorable photos to cover ( Read more... )

So I read the schedule at work wrong again today. Second Sunday running, woot! This caused my wakeup call to kind of SUCk but the day wasn't too bad. I was a little bummed cuz I didn't really get to spend much time with Steve, but it was nice to sleep in his arms nonetheless, even without being much conscious. I'm starting to see that maybe my boss ( Read more... )

urggle. so tired. It was a very long day, and seemed twice that because I was dreading today for about three weeks. I was supposed to take the SAT today. Well fuck the SAT. I had to work and go to a choir rehearsal thingy, and now I'm home and I have a list of things I ought to do but just cannot muster the will to perform. Like I OUGHT to be ( Read more... )

Today is stressful. Today is confusing. Today I am confused. I don't know what I'm feeling, or what I ought to be feeling. I want a gesture, something, anything really. I am going to see a play at the Art School in a little while, and then I'll turn on my phone and see that nobody has called me. Right? I feel so pessemistic of a sudden, and I ( Read more... )

I LOVE the rain!! Life is good today...well it's good to be alive every day you possibly can, but my perspective is 180 degrees happier today. I blame it on hormones. Fucking hormones. I'm in the library with much time to myself today, and I don't know what I shall do with it! I love that, there is infinate possibility in the next few hours. I'll ( Read more... )

my day was stressful. My confidence is shaken. I feel like maybe my boss doesn't like me. I don't feel like I have to ability to write anymore. The summer changed me. For better or worse? I used to know my strengths, my weaknesses, my talents. Then summer happened, and I became afraid to sing and afraid to laugh because I was afraid I would take ( Read more... )

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