I watched a musical and I’m just so sad :)

My greatest fears sit at polar opposites of the spectrum and I was doomed to face one or the other eventually but the realization of it is so incredible jarring.

Settling or rejection.
Boredom or abandonment.
Monotony or risk.

And yet when watching this musical my heart absolutely broke, not because of the main ( Read more... )

i finally met someone here, which is a fuckin feat!!! she’s super cool and we have a lot in common and i think she’s gonna invite me out and i can’t wait. we met on a dating app but she has like no experience with girls soooo we might just be friends lol

i think i will make a habit of spending time every sunday in nature, literally nothing makes me ( Read more... )

making notes here about my current clarity

it’s so easy and important to eat the right foods and drink lots of water
i also feel better when i don’t eat at all from time to time

i love getting out of the house even if i’m alone, even if i don’t talk to anyone or get anything out of it. just experiencing life is worth it.

i deserve to feel sexy and ( Read more... )

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Hoo buddy. What a time. What a tim time timmy time time. So I had surgery on my endometriosis on 12/16. Had a period on 12/31 and it didn’t really hurt. Then 3nd week of January I got mad depressed and my brain got all wonky then I had one of the worst periods ever. It hurt SO BAD. It still hurts. I’m bleeding more than usual and I am so tired and ( Read more... )

It happened again. I absolutely broke on Sunday, after hours of school and work stress. I cried and cried and cried and thought about ending my life and thought about ending my life as I knew it. Most of this was entirely in my head, but I made the conscious decision to squash the valid concerns ASAP, instead of wallowing, seething, serfing.

I got ( Read more... )

Today was big, we had a long meeting and I worked a 10 hour day but now it’s time for a 3 day weekend! ✨ I am sooooo relieved about the new podcast team, they’re so responsive and pay great attention to detail. Eons better than the other one.

I also keep thinking about the automation and setting that up and it’s simultaneously exciting and daunting ( Read more... )

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I can feel bits of inspiration coming at me. In little blips, though. Fleeting aha moments that make me feel entirely different.

I’m thinking a lot about the ether. I know there’s something more than what our 5 senses allow. Sometimes I forget. I get all sopped into the goop of “reality” and then I am a slave to the 3rd dimension.

I do not care how ( Read more... )