This past weekend I was a busy girl. I had lots of planning and purchasing to do for my parents' upcoming 40th wedding anniversary party. I had the pleasure of running all over town and buying pink and white decorations for the swarey. The total (so far) for the decorations alone is nye on $150. This sucks, because as most of you know, I work at ( Read more... )

As spring is coming into full bloom, it brings with it many things: the stench of rotting animal carcass, a huge stack of Hail policies, phone calls from idiot agents, and of course spiders and flies burning in the halogen lamp. With all these wondrous aspects of spring, I become more and more aware of the empty, rust colored chair that sits beside ( Read more... )

I realized today that there is something else that deeply creeps me F out.......old people chewing. I was sitting at the lunch table at work, watching my soap as usual.  I happen to look over and see this guy, Don, eating his lunch. The way he was chewing his food made me want to projectile vomit! It was utterly disturbing. Some of you crazy-ass ( Read more... )

So, I'm sitting here at work and my cell phone rings. I look at the display and it's a number that I don't recognize, but it's a 217 area code, so I answer. I didn't recognize the person's voice and since they mispronounced my name, I knew it wasn't anyone I knew personally. So I asked who was calling. It was a fucking TELEMARKETER! Some bitch ( Read more... )

I'm all for happiness and being in a good mood. In fact, I'm in a good mood right now. I actually recommend being in good moods. However, what I do not endorse is when people are OVERLY cheery ALL THE DAMN TIME! It's the fake-ass "my life is so great, so be jealous of me" attitude that I cannot stand. I know there might be good, cool things going ( Read more... )

One random thing before I begin, it actually smells good in here today. LJ got a honeydew scented candle, and it doesn't reek for once. Yay!

Okay, I was just sitting here thinking about nicknames and how many I've had over the years. Let me list a few:
~Joan
~Jones
~Jay Z
~Little Z
~Ralph
~Jopfy
~Jonsie
~Jibby
~Jib
~J Holla!
~Zimmerperson (the "politically ( Read more... )

As some of you might know, Brokeback Mountain won the Golden Globe for best drama last night. A little background on the movie = it's about 2 queer cowboys who have families of their own but go up on this mountain for a "cattle drive" or something, but the only thing they accomplish is herding their beef into each other's caves. (I know what you're ( Read more... )

Q:WHO'S BED DID YOU SLEEP IN LAST NIGHT?
A: mine

Q:WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING?
A: black

Q:HOW MANY PEOPLE ON YOUR LIST DO YOU KNOW 'IN REAL LIFE'?
A: what list? L.J.?….um, 3

Q:WHAT COLOR ARE YOUR UNDIES RIGHT NOW?
A: red & black

Q:DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS?
A: 3 cats, 2 fish, 1 dog, 1 hamster

Q:MOST RECENT MOVIE THAT YOU WATCHED?
A: DVD = The Office ( ( Read more... )

Okay, I've got a few minutes to give a quick overview of the past few days. First, I had to go to the "girl doctor"....Insert your pity here. Anyway, the very next day I had to go to the real doctor because my ass (and by ass I mean entire body) decided that it would get sick just a couple days before New Years! Damn you, body!! So I had a fever ( Read more... )

IT FINALLY HAPPENED! Cingular got my number ported!!! It only took 10 days...no, not hours...DAYS! I honestly can't express the level of pissed-off-ness that I was harboring for the past week or so about this whole phone deal. Now, my phone is functioning and I don't have to mail dead rodents to Cingular. (Kidding about the rodents....kinda.) Bonus ( Read more... )