Run-on sentence for the kids:

I'm sure you care to know that my sleazy grandfather cheated on my alcoholic grandmother (who later committed suicide) all through their marriage, later wed a stripper in Vegas to only divorce her months later, went BROKE PHI BROKE due to financing too many cars and titty jobs for younger women, blatantly hit on my ( Read more... )

What Needs To Be Retired From This Past Year:Furry boots (I think I said this last year too ( Read more... )

Yeah, it's been a no good, terrible, very bad year but goddamn, my bfflz are the bees knees.


( Read more... )

I'm giddy, and I actually have a lot to write about. Soon!

PSA: Loreal's Voluminous Waterproof mascara is a god send! Without fail, I always cry at weddings, and the bonafide warrior of the mascara world deserves a little e-product placement for it's reliability. My cousin, Jess, and her husband are so utterly in love, their adoration borders on the drippy, popsicle in the Sahara side. They're the sort of ( Read more... )

MTV'S recent Made episode showcasing that god given angel from Westerville South should be renamed TRUE LIFE: BOBBY GOLDEN, A LOT OF KIDS WOULD PROBABLY CREAM THEIR JEANS TO PUNCH YOU IN THE FACE AND HONESTLY, PRESENTING YOURSELF AS AN ARROGANT DOUCHE BAG IS NOT TOO CUNNING A LIFE STRATEGY (however it does make for highly entertaining television ( Read more... )

I quiver with anticipation for the day of Westerville North's ten (or even five) year high school reunion. Recent news regarding marriage/relationships, pregnancy, and an otherwise wilting of aspiration has forced me to reexamine the possibility of karma in this world. No joke.

regarding poor decisions made in life and strange, strange, strange interactions between people:

"Yeah, you'll have that."I'm getting this tattooed on my forehead, okay? Probably in French, because that would undoubtedly make me deep (like the ocean), and as a result, somehow better! That, or I will begin employing this phrase much more often. ( Read more... )

This past Sunday, the pastor of my church nonchalantly mentioned that we shared the same tune on our MySpace pages. I didn't really have a chance to respond. No, "Oh, you like Birdmonster too?" or "Wait, you have a MySpace?" or even, "Fuck! You didn't happen to see that I have 'watching well narrated porn on the Sabbath' listed under my ( Read more... )

GOOD NEWS! Things are bound to be improving these days. This can be attributed to A.) the academic hiatus otherwise known as Summer Break I am currently on, B.) the fact that I did extremely well this semester, and C.) my progressing relationships with friends, both old and new.

A.) I was quite the Studious McStudenstein this semester, so for ( Read more... )