I cant really define my emotions right now but I know for sure that there are alot of them scrambling about my brain picking fights with one another. there is one person in my life who I regret being friends with, the sheer reminder makes me so frusturated. it just makes me hate myself for being so naieve. Because of this friendship i have hurt and ( Read more... )

everyone is wrong. maybe not everyone...but i can certainly think of 3 people off the top of my head who are wrong about most of the things that they say.
I know that this sounds childish. its just that im right.

i cant believe im packing. i cant believe this (very short) era is coming to the end. for a while it felt like forever away but now its so close and im scared. EVERYONE is asking me why i am leaving and where i am going. and to be honest, i dont know. WHY THE FUCK AM I LEAVING AND WHERE THE FUCK AM I GOING?? going back to woodstock would be more or ( Read more... )

im about to leave my apartment, my job, my roomates and essentially the person who i currently seem to be. i dont know if i will ever be able to enjoy this as much as i did, but im glad i got to see it for what it is, it is no longer a judgment. culture shock sucked and it scared me. i dont know if i am suited for college. college is for people who ( Read more... )

FUCK. im retarted. i hate boys. HATE. they are all faggots. for real ( Read more... )

when i was in ninth grade i made a documentary about political activism in america. while i was filming a march in new york i came across these two handsom boys-college students, clearly far older than i was, far wiser than i was, and far cooler than i was. one of them had a sign on his back pack that said "we need a ride home to newpaltz" So me ( Read more... )

so. patrick came to visit me for about a week, and it was pretty intense/emotional as expected. i wish our friendship wasnt so difficult to maintain but i guess thats one of its appeals...sigh. i freaked out and drove upstate and made a feast. i dropped patrick off at the germantown farm and was overcome with regrets of not spending more time in ( Read more... )

DUDE. my life. is soooooooooo BLACK and WHITE. because im as fucking bi polar as this earth that we here live on. at least i have a bunch of new soft tee shirts. yesterday i cried. ALLLOT. for no REAL reason. but when i was leaving work everyone in the office was talking about how their job was the worst right in front of me when they all know ( Read more... )

IM such a LURK. i found party boy on myspace and he has a ladddyyy freind. ooops

im not sure how i managed to rationalize this BUT. the way i see it, the more people you ( Read more... )