it may not always be so; and i say
that if your lips, which i have loved, should touch
another's, and your dear strong fingers clutch
her heart, as mine in time not far away;
if on another's face your sweet hair lay
in such silence as i know, or such
great writhing words as, uttering overmuch,
stand helplessly before the spirit at bay;

if this should be, i ( Read more... )

the porcelain god beckons.
an empty house,
four white looming walls,
closing in.
i give in.
it's inevitable,
self-fulfilling prophecy,
bound to kneel to the pagan
that dominates my soul
again and again and again.
it ravages my body,
wiping it clean,
removing it of all
that is good and just,
instilling it instead with
pain, agony, suffering - 
relief.
the ( Read more... )

i have nothing left to say.

i'm an emotionless, barren canvas.

stark white.

awaiting my next suitor,

to paint my heart to pieces.

you did the job so well,

i almost let you stay.

but you used the wrong paint.

oh no, the incorrect color!

the lighting? what a wreck.

your paintbrush ran amuck across my

unadulterated innocence.

but something in the feel of the

( Read more... )

  GET OUT OF MY DREAMS.

get out of my head.

get. the. fuck. out. already.

please.
just leave me alone....

badday. badnight.
when will it all end?
when?

 "You little creep,"
That's what she said, 
these quotes from my mother,
get better every day.
And you'll be nothing, just like your father,
at least that's what the kids at school say.

so what.

today was actually decent. i had a really shitty night (i ate to much candy and ended up vomiting everywhere. it was beautiful. totally unintentional, too.) so i decided to stay home from school and spend some quality time with my mom. it was really a wonderful day. i cannot even begin to describe how happy i am to have her back in my life. i ( Read more... )

i'm angry ( Read more... )

this is going to sound like a jambled bunch of mishmosh:

last night, i came home around 8 and was nothing short of ecstatic. why i was is of no consequence, but just that i was something other than moderately happy/moderately miserable is saying something. by about eleven, that feeling had waned, and nearly unbearably so.
i despise that i'm so ( Read more... )

oh goodness!
:D
so yeah. i'm relatively happy right now.
i love having things to do and never being home. 
it's wonderful.

i drive so much. it's absolutely ridiculous.
i like visiting people though, so i don't mind :]

i'm going to sleep! big calc test tomorrow. booooooo.

lessons learned:
do not, for any reason, call every person in your phone book after having consumed mass amounts of alcohol.
don't consume mass amounts of alcohol, period, as you will most likely spend your morning barfing your brains out.
do not agree to anything seeminly risky while drunk.
do not text people while drunk, especially people that = ( Read more... )