Nothing like getting rattled around a little, huh? Wouldn't have been so bad if the jolt hadn't broke that good, good bottle of whiskey that I wished for. And here I thought I'd skipped out on 'be careful what you wish for.' Kinda' bums me out ( Read more... )

Funny thing to think on, ages. One weird manipulation later, and I'm a pretty cool guy. It happens now and again, and it's always a little unsettling. Don't like it much ( Read more... )

School's out, school's out,
Teacher let the monkeys out.
One went east, one went west,
One went up the teacher's dress.Whatever. I had this kid I went to grade school that sang like song like it was a fuckin' radio single. I clocked him when I got sick of it. He told his mom and she told my mom and my momma told her that she was raising her boy to ( Read more... )

Today would be a good, fuckin' day to carry that big stick everyone's so fond of. Especially if you're the zoo-goin' type ( Read more... )

Well, ain't this been a hoot and a half? There're just times when the City gets tired o' thinking of new shit, and so all this muddled garbage comes out. Pain in the ass.

Oh. Shoot... What's-your-name. Um. Shit. Chinese. Xiao... Yan Zi? Xiao Yan Zi! There we go. You! Her.

( Here you go. )

Never was a big fan of pageant queens. Always wondered if they actually thought they could do shit for anybody, for the good of the world. I'd say anybody would think those speeches are a load of horse shit, but beauty girls are usually a whole new level of vacuous. Ain't none of 'em got real cans, neither ( Read more... )

Now all that shit wasn't hard. Y'all just like fussin', and now it's turned you slow. How's that doin' as a status of character ( Read more... )

It's some kinda shit to have a fever and then to wake up days later on the other side of town. Heard what happened, though. Probably puked more than I have any other time of my life. Or, well, any other time during my sentience ( Read more... )

Shit. Well, my alarm didn't go off, and I'm pretty sure, by the look of things, that I done overslept. Only question now is: How late am I ( Read more... )

Well wasn't that cute? All you motherfuckers are real inspiring, talking about how much you love all the shit in your life ( Read more... )