"At the behest of well-meaning friends, I have purchased books on how to be happy. I have tried to turn my chronic scowl into a bright smile. I have attempted to become more active, to get away from my dark house and away from my somber books and participate in the world of meaningful action. … I have contemplated getting a dog. I have started ( Read more... )

March 23, 2012

Food: 2/2 stayed way under 900 cals
Water: 1. 5 litres I think, 1 cup of tea
Ex: 0/2
Challenge: 2/2 Watched an ep of 'Heavy'
Post: 2/2

300 grams of carrots
6 whole wheat crackers
2 servings of apple spread
1 small orange
500 gr quark
1 small tin of vegetable soup

Hey all! Starting tomorrow with my second *serious* cycle. Last one was in January 2011 and lost 15 lbs then (gained them all back of course, but hey!). Super excited/motivated to get started again. My goal is to lose 14-15 lbs once again. Would be super batshit crazy happy if it'd work. Of course its just a start cause I have 50+ lbs to lose in ( Read more... )

Water 1/2
Challenge 2/2
Post 2/2

Still not good, but better

Today was so weird eating wise. I had an epiphany I think? Suddenly I realized that I must start eating healthily.

I want 80 kgs by Jan 1st. Which is 100 grams a day, 1.5 lbs a week. Totally doable.

Healthy. Me. Fucking weird.

From bottom to top, Disgusting Things About My Body:

Feet

Some of the nails on my toes are very hard, a lot of cuticle. I also have quite some callus on my feet. t
-Paint toe nails, get pedicure more often

Lower legs
I have quite a lot of scars on my lower legs and ankles, from mosquito bites etc. And my shins are so white!
-Accept, keep shins hydrated, ( Read more... )

My body is so fucking disgusting I can't begin to tell you.. Not just weight but also I'm covered in scars and stretch marks and ITS GROSS. It's affecting my sex life. I dont want my boyfriend to look at me, and I always thought girls like that were pathetic.

Also I dont want to go on top. I dont want him checking out my ass etc.

FUCK.

I just had 6 ricecakes with pb and 2 with grilled chicken. And a cup of yogurt ( Read more... )

So, last year we finished highschool. Summer's over and everyone's starting their new lives ( Read more... )

I need something stronger than Prozac. Having suicidal/desperate flashes again.

I am 19 years old and I don't know what I'm fighting for.
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