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You make me sad ( Read more... ) -
happy!
today, i made myself two rock gardens - one for home, and one for the office. i bought a pretty desk plant for work, i'm naming it cat.
my sister breeds betas, and she's going to send me one for a work pet. i'm so excited to get it! i love love love animals. :)
basically, everything feels pretty good right now. i've been to two AA meetings this week ( Read more... ) -
frustration.
i'm at work right now, and i'm feeling massive amounts of frustration ( Read more... ) -
my first aa meeting.
i made my first aa meeting tonight.
it was much less scary than i thought, and i really liked the people there. it was a women's only group.
i even shared.
the only thing i didn't like was the group praying - mainly because i don't believe in repeating the same prayers to god over and over again. i understand the serenity prayer is more of a mantra ( Read more... ) -
Step one.
okay, well. i'm going through my step one in my book, "a gentle path through the 12 steps." and i need to share my powerlessness inventory and my unmanageability inventory. so here goes:
powerlessness inventory
1. i drank dad's alcohol even though i knew i'd probably get caught & punished.
2. i drank myself sick the night before my first ever ( Read more... ) -
the horrors of being a sexually active female NOT on the pill.
a quiet moment at works afford me the time to update.
the first thing on my mind, is i'm scared i'm pregnant. this happens every so often, mostly because i'm not on the pill. and i don't use condoms. so that leaves other forms of (much less effective) birth control. add a few early pregnancy symptoms in there, and i'm horrified - even though i haven ( Read more... ) -
AA.
i've finally made up my mind to go ahead and join an aa group. there's one near my house on saturday mornings and tuesday nights that's women only, called "safe & sound." i'm very scared, but i can't go on like this. it's fucking awful ( Read more... ) -
First update in a long time.
an update. where to begin ( Read more... ) -
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I'm back. -
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ever since i stopped drinking, i cry almost as much as i did when i was teenager. it's ridiculous. i spent years working on learning to control my tears - no matter how badly i wanted to cry - and now, i can't seem to stop them. i don't even understand why they get set off half the time.
tonight i thought about the way my mom smells. the mix of ( Read more... )