today karin told me that katie is moving in tomorrow. when she said that, i was hit by a sudden wall of panic. i knew she would be moving back sometime soon, but i was kinda hoping that day would not come, at least not for a long while. i have really liked this whole not seeing her thing. its been good for me. but it will soon be over ( Read more... )

 i looked forward to the Dodger game today probably more than anything else this month, certainly more than disneyland, and the night before, everyone bailed on me. to say i am upset and disappointed would be an understatement.

the only positive thing from it is that i get to spend more time with sydney and whitney than i otherwise would have. ( Read more... )

 i told Linda the other day that this had been the worst summer of my life. i sit here now that it is almost over and wonder if that is true. its hard to say. i certainly have never had a more frustrating summer, what with my girlfriend not talking to me and eventually dumping me, while at the same time i fall for my best friend who does not have ( Read more... )

 so today i went down to see katie for the first time in over a month. i left knowing it would be the last time i would see her this summer, and the last time i would ever see that house again. when i got there, she was quiet, and would not answer me as to what she wanted to do while i was there. after awkwardly standing around for 15-20 minutes ( Read more... )

 i am getting dizzy. i have made a complete circle in my feelings toward katie in the last month. i am now back to where i started: fully committed to waiting it out and trying to make things work. over the last few days i have been reminded of how much i really like her and how much i miss her. and how much i would regret not giving it a chance. ( Read more... )

so we talked about it. a nice open honest conversation. i explained my feelings, she explained hers. there was no awkwardness or clumsiness. it was nice. except i didn't quite get what i wanted. she turned me down. but thats ok. i was very much expecting that. but something needed to happen. everything is much clearer now. i have recommitted to ( Read more... )

i don't know what to say. today was kind of a weird day ( Read more... )

 katie leaves today and won't be back until August 14. i will be totally out of contact with her until then. i was hoping i would get to talk to her a little before she left, but surprise surprise no contact from her at all since i saw her last week. we will see how these couple weeks go. they might be the best thing to happen to us this summer. ( Read more... )

I better rest my eyes, 'cause I'm growing weary of this point you've been trying to make ( Read more... )

it is frustrating that I have been having more fun with the other girls I hang out with lately than i have in the few times i have gotten to see katie ( Read more... )