i've come to terms that ( Read more... )

redecorating my room has been a strange sense of therapy for me.
loooooook:

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sometimes imagining something is enough to keep you content. like just the idea of it is enough. i dont know if anyone even knows what i mean.

BUT this is happiness:

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Every part of my body seems to be drained to the core. I ache in places I didn't even know existed. I don't think it's all physical anguish (considering I'm always lazy at tennis.) I just feel like I'm constantly moving from the second I wake up to the second I lay down to sleep. It's like "okay get up! routine schedule routine schedule routine. do ( Read more... )

I'd be lost without all the lists I make. If someone saw one of them lying around I swear they would think I'm nuts. I will write the simplest things down. Believe me when I say I'll write a list about ANYTHING. They range from what I need at the store. To my dreams. To "Dont forget to feed Henry." To remembering my plans. To places I want to ( Read more... )

Avoiding confrontation and other foolish thoughts have seemed to benefit me. I know its not good to ignore the way you feel but sometimes its exactly what needs to happen. Another thing. Waiting on everyone else will get you nowhere. Sure patience is a virtue but its different when it becomes a waste of time. This isn't the beginning of a ( Read more... )

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i've made alot of random plans lately. always keeping busy and it feels absolutely amazing. but theres this little bug in the corner of my mind and in my dreams that i can't escape. every time. i don't know just exactly what it is, but i have a vague idea. sometimes i hate being human. i leave room for questioning at the end of every move i make. ( Read more... )

it seems that i like to keep alot of things open. my water bottles for example. you'll never find one im drinking with a cap on. this leads to major spillage. the bathroom door-- always open. strange as that may be. lights. i always forget to shut them. therefore, they remain open. even my opinions. they're usually open. that's got to mean ( Read more... )

Right now I'm enjoying my delicious hershey's chocolate bar. Along with some apple cinnamon black tea which is my new fancy :D I'm noticing that most of the people I know are EXTREMELY predictable. It's become something like an annoying blockade. With this in mind, I continue to believe people will change(SIKE!) It's getting a little out of ( Read more... )