I have started. My bitter tears have rolled down once again the already cold and darkened face that is now used to the daily breakdowns. I have considered them ritual. My heart went from warm, filled with past memories, with hope, to cold, and now im frozen with no thoughts. Numb to my mind and dry to my heart is perpetual. Thoughts that swim ( Read more... )

i love findley merritt more than life itself...

i mean what? NO SHE DIDNT HACK ONTO SHAUNA'S LIVE JOURNAL BECUZ SHE KNOWS THE PASSWORD ATTEMPTING TO LEAVE HER A MESSAGE???

oops ;)
i love you shauna...

Won't someone be my wonderwall?...How am i going to escape this insane place called home. Sara is only twenty min. away but with my mom she is just as far as alyssa...but then again alyssa was going to come to my house but couldnt. She needed to spend time with her family. Idk i understand family is important and if i had a strong family i ( Read more... )

It's the first day back and the bitching has begun. I'm starting to think that my mom just finds pleasure in yelling at me. She has no problem with my brother or sister...am i that much worse? I realize that i am just a dissapointment but theres no pleasing her and i've accepted that. As i sit here on my computer trying to escape her craziness ( Read more... )

Sitting there watching my past memories of summer slowly fading from my memory...as i try to focus on the future. The sky was darkened by the clouds but something was still bright. There was small hope for happiness tonight and as the warm air turned into a cold chill that flew down my spine to my feet and back up to my heart that has begun to ( Read more... )

This year seems so long, yet fast...fucked up, yet fun...and somewhere behind every situation seems to be sweet yet bitter. In one word, just a bittersweet year. I started out with four best friends and one sweet boyfriend. Sara Fin Kristen Alex and Michael were my life! I loved them and everything was great and with them time went by fast... ( Read more... )

Everyday its the same, always trying to find happinss, and as bj and i have decided "feeling good or ok" is satisfying to us now. I am willing to spend everyday looking for my past self. I do realize that we grow up and change but im willing to change into a different person, the happier and better person that i used to be. I have turned into ( Read more... )

I JUST WANNA GIVE UP!!!!!!!!!! NOTHING SEEMS REACHABLE AND NOTHING SEEMS WORTH IT ANYMORE...I NEED FAITH IN MYSELF BEFORE I CONTINTUE TO LIVE DAY TO DAY BUT SOMEHOW I CANT FIND THIS....WHAT WILL IT TAKE????????????????????????????????

Run away, Run away ( Read more... )

ok im so excited but i can't say ahhhh!!! haha george we're such good party people lol i love ya girl and alyssa for my sweet note!!! that girl is crazy. Im so glad to actually have her back. Maybe things will go back to the way they used to feel, slowly...idk just maybe? anyways im going to go now...no NOT TO EAT hehe