So we're a bit over a month into 2011, and I haven't accomplished as much as I feel obligated to. I signed up for classes at UNF, only to be purged from them when my father and I both forgot to pay for tuition. In the intervening period, my prescription for my meds ran out and my doctor refused to refill it; not good times. This likely had ( Read more... )

So I've emerged from the Den of Despair (tm) that my life became at the 2nd of 2010 there... and have steadily become much healthier and happier.  I sought treatment for what was diagnosed as major depression (nailed it) and I have not felt this good this consistently in a very long time.  I learned a large number of things along the way and have ( Read more... )

After another very difficult weekend, struggling with myself in my own head, I finally hit something approaching rock bottom. I broke down, though to say that it only happened this weekend wouldn't do the rest of the process justice. This really happened over the course of the last two months or so ( Read more... )

I started reading some of my old posts and I can't help but laugh at myself a little bit- I don't begrudge me for using this space as a venting utility sometimes, and it's true that I don't use it very much anymore... but damn, it bothers me that in every post I come off as a whiny bitch. At least, that's my interpretation. So let's jazz this ( Read more... )

So as all the entries I've made in the last year+ point out, I set out on this self-improvement kick about a year ago. Mixed results so far. The superficial aspects of me are changed, and for the better. This I've noted thus far. However, it became highly apparent over the last several days that there is still so much more to be done ( Read more... )

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It has been an extraordinarily eventful year (by that I mean for the time in between last year's breakup and today). As a man I have experienced far and away the most growth and development that I have undergone in my adult life. When Theresa left, the point came crashing home hard that I had not established enough in my life beyond my ( Read more... )

I find that I am rather excited at this juncture in my life. I'm 6 credits away from graduating, which is good, but I'm rather more pre-occupied with my personal growth as an individual. Today I feel a greater sense of self-worth than I ever have... because finally the proper effort is being invested in the quality of individual I am. I think I' ( Read more... )

For what it's worth, I feel as though I've come to a very tenable, peaceful understanding with the feelings I've had for the past month. It wasn't easy... at all. There were good days and bad days. But I'm here. Better than that, I feel the desire to grow and produce. I want to actualize my potential for my own sake; for my personal life. It' ( Read more... )

An emotion I've become quite familiar with lately is fear. I find myself these days to be very, very afraid about an increasingly large number of things. Essentially, for the past month, I've been sorting through the wreckage of the life I've lead thus far. I'm looking for the things that are worth keeping and that which must be improved, and it ( Read more... )