Every year about this time I send out a nonsensical blog post about the coming of some silly li'l thing known as the "Turkeypocalypse." For you newcomers out there, the Turkeypocalypse is basically the large-scale uprising of hundreds of thousands of turkeys, enacting dire vengeance upon mankind for centuries of being consumed during what they feel ( Read more... )

Bob sat alone on the couch watching reruns of a show that was either a reality show about a young woman celebrating her 21st birthday or a documentary about violent shark attacks when he heard a distant whistle. He got up and looked out the window of his 25th story condo and saw nothing in the dark Atlanta night ( Read more... )

Here it be. If no one responds then I'll be forced to make up stuff for everyone that'll be total nonsense and heresy ( Read more... )

First off, lemme spoil part 1 for you ( Read more... )

3 days in New York, pretty good stuff. These things I have learned in my time here ( Read more... )

Aight, so after watchin' that Survivorman show I decided to become a wilderness expert for myself. I drove out to the woods this weekend, whipped out my tent, laid out on the grass and promptly had about 25,000 fireants bite me on the a ( Read more... )

Er, is anyone out there alive in LJ land anymore? I haven't touched this thing since freakin' Thanksgiving but I'm sure there's a handful of ya out there that are at least still thinking about updating.

Every year I warn you all about this, and every year it gets closer. The Turkeypocalypse is no joke, it's a serious and deadly event that scares the literal sh1t out of me (I just changed pants, TWICE ( Read more... )

w00t ( Read more... )

So, I've gotta vacate the premises next month and the apartment hunt is going about as well as can be expected with my well-known slothiness (that's not even a word). My initial thought was to hunt for places in Marietta, Kennesaw, Smynra, and Vinnings. Then I thought, "Hey, I don't really like having money, why don't I look in the Virginina ( Read more... )