Now he wants to be with me.

Now he sends me a huge long message declaring his love and his regret for putting me through hell the past two months.

And now?

I don't know what to do.

( Dun Dun Dun... The Talk with Dr. X )

I don't think I'm quite there yet.

I have had two experiences this weekend/week so far that have boosted my self-esteem in regards to members of the opposite sex, but at the same time... I am clearly not over Dr. X just yet.

( Experience 1: A New )

I can text him without worrying some of the time.

I don't think about him as much as I used to. I mean, he's not in my thoughts ALL of the time. Only some of the time.

My therapist said I made a breakthrough when I said "I'm not over him YET" (Yet is more hopefully than "never")

And now that his grandma's cancer surgery is over, he's calmed down / ( Read more... )

A post of a different nature today. I don't want to talk about Monica leaving for England, or about Dr. X and his issues or about how therapy is going, etc, etc.

I took a personality quiz (www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/JTypes2.asp) and then found this really funny personality explanation at this website(http://www.xeromag.com/fun/personality.html) ( Read more... )

I spent all night tuesday being worried about my upcoming therapy appointment. It is not covered under OHIP so it costs $150 a session and I was worried about it being a waste of money (even though my parents told me not to worry about that) and that it wouldn't help. I had a major anxiety attack in the AM and was like two hours late for work ( Read more... )

This has not been a Merry Christmas and I feel awful for putting my family through all this. I think the Dr X thing opened up an avalanche of all these issues... my doctor said that maybe my anxiety was covering up some depression. And now, I'm pretty sure that's what is going on in my head.

My self-esteem has never been great. I think that's why ( Read more... )

So I've told a few people, but everytime I try to tell a new person I break down and hurt so much more. So I'll just send this in a text ( Read more... )

Tonight packed a pretty big punch. Someone's pulse stopped in front of me.

I was on the streetcar home from work reading Harry Potter, when I heard this random snoring noise coming from the seat across from me. The man to his left started shaking him and yelling "John! John! Wake up!". He made those wierd snoring noises for the next few minutes ( Read more... )

We've somehow transitioned to using the terms "cutie", "babe", and "baby girl". I've never used cutesy terms like that before... well, except maybe cutie. But never babe. I always thought they were cheesy. But now?

.... I love it.