[Well, that was fun! Teatime isn't too happy about being tricked, but that delightful little toy they had given him more than made up for it. He wonders if he'll ever get it back. He'd like that.

Oh, well. Another unusual happenstance, another belonging from home returned to him. He's never really had many personal belongings, so he has no idea what ( Read more... )

[Well, like most things in Teatime's life, Valentine's was highly traumatic and he will do his best to repress the entire incident in the most healthy way possible. At least he gets a present out of it, even though he doesn't recognize it at first. What strange lettering...

And then, it hits him: It's those books! The ones the wizard Sidney had ( Read more... )

[Mayfield, today you will find a nine year old boy wandering about the town. A normal sight, you say, but there's something... off about this boy: He's dressed far too nicely to be a drone child, for starters. Though he seems confused and lost, he doesn't say a word to any drones who approach him, instead staring up at them with a blank expression ( Read more... )

[So, Teatime got the attack turkey.

And it's awesome.

So he'll just spend an hour or two stalking that motherfucker through the house before dismembering it in the living room in the most horrific way possible. The Macy's Day Parade bored him and he needed something to do.

A little while later, he'll pick up the phone.]

I rather like this holiday! Is ( Read more... )

[And, thus, things go back to normal-- for a relative value of normal, of course.

Teatime has long since thrown the school-supplied lesson plan to the wind with a resounding “FUCK. THAT. SHIT,” so today's lesson is, as always, a bit unorthodox. Hanging from the flagpole-- and when I say “hang” I mean “by a fucking noose holy shit”-- is a skeleton. ( Read more... )

[Are there even dark alleyways in Mayfield? Well, there are now, and Teatime has been dragging random drones down into one all day. Why? Because he's a great Assassin who just so happens to be at the beck and call of the world's tiniest mafia don. Why? Because he is a loser haven't you realized this.]

Tell me what you know about the Smiths.

They've ( Read more... )

[Because Life has a wicked sense of humor, Teatime has been given an occupation that gives him far more access to children than anyone should be comfortable with. He's not quite sure what he teaches-- maths or maybe Spanish was mentioned at one point, possibly-- or even what grade level. Not like he cares. He'll teach any student that shows up, and ( Read more... )

[The first thing you'll notice is the blood.

The entire left side of his face is covered in it. It's in his hair, on his clothes-- no wonder he's walking a little haphazardly. Not that he seems to mind much. That's the second thing you notice. He's smiling, smiling through the blood on his teeth. Because insanity has a funny way of insulating you ( Read more... )

[Now, when one wakes up to find two rosy-cheeked young children calling you Daddy and jumping on you when you were quite sure that but a few minutes ago you had been killed, there are only so many ways one can react. You could scream. You could scream and then go examine your surroundings. You could question the children as to your location. Or, ( Read more... )

Hey.

Hey.

Heeeey.

This is my crit post. Please help me be the creepiest bastard I can be!

Contact: TrekFaerie on AIM