every desire i have remains unfulfilled.  i try not to dream for dreams means desiring and desiring means failing which mean sadness. everything always comes back to pain or sadness

is there a better way? a better place? i just sit here

so yesterday i needed to take an edge off. so i got drunk and now i've had stomach ache and headache all day. its all self-inflicted

ive had  a tough couple of weeks. i came really close to suicide. i'd finally got to the point in my mind where i was alright about it and i was really looking forward to death. whatever that was going to be

i was ( Read more... )

i had one ( Read more... )

( Read more... )

one day at the park there was this girl
she used to go upto all the boys and ask if she could give them handjobs

"can i give you a handjob?"

"you'd have a hard job of it" replied my friend

she'd get rejected by them all
then later on i heard her asking her mate for advice

"undo the top buttons of your jeans" replied the so called friend

so i was treated ( Read more... )

i saw people and houses
i saw them flocking and flitting about
and i knew i was not one of them
and never would be

i saw them happy and only felt sad
because they never share anything with me

i woke up in the middle of a dream
i was having sex with one girl whilst another stood over me berating

got up and sat on a bench in the sun.
closed my eyes
my eyes ( Read more... )

also RIP syd barret

once there was a man
a friend of mine who hanged

and i felt guilty
but i was greatful because he turned me onto to some of best things in my life

once there was a jamie who lost his way

more than one

more than two wondered in the woods

thinking about hanging as they chcekd out the schoolgirls legs

thinking about drinking until they could touch the sky

and ( Read more... )

(poem goes here)

(woe here)

(fantasies here)

"next record please arm. thankyou"

no walk tonight. too many fightin' cunts

which reminds me . i got wassailed earlier by some cunt from the door of my local

i fantasised about breaking his nose with a snooker cue and then stamping on his neck BUT NICE BOYS DONT DO THINGS LIKE THAT

msn?

so i went out after the whole bottle ( Read more... )