I'm not crying wolf, I swear. I really do want to die. Don't worry, my psychiatrist knows.

In other news, my medication has been upped significantly.
I have a great boyfriend, a great house, a great cat, and a job. So why kill myself? Because living the way I've lived as long as I can remember is terrible. I despise everything about myself. I am sad ( Read more... )

I made a decision. I'm going up to Lake Almanor April 20-22 for some much-needed r&r. I feel awful because I know certain friends want me to have a party, but the last time I threw a party (for a friend) my bipolar tendencies went through the roof. The party I threw before that, my anxiety got so bad that I was screaming and threatening to slit my ( Read more... )

Ben still hasn't told his dad/stepmom that we're going to be gone the weekend of his stepsister's baby's baptism (my birthday) so I told him I'm going to Almanor alone if he won't fess up. I'm probably being too stubborn about it. But we did tell his stepmother that we had plans for that weekend when she mentioned it. A week later, Ben gets a call ( Read more... )

I listened to the sample ... don't feel like I just took a bong hit or dropped a tab ... but they say that's how it works!

http://www.i-doser.com/

A reason not to smoke for you right here ( Read more... )

After waiting over four years ... HE finally called ( Read more... )

It was a lot of fun! I really dug all of the kids who were screaming things like, "You suck, Umaga!" We saw Super Crazy, the Highlanders, Crime Time, Umaga, Carlito, Shawn Michaels, and John Cena (my new cutie-pie second to Adam Carolla ( Read more... )

In alphabetical, not biographical or sentimental, order ...

L.A. Woman - The Doors

It reminds me of my happy, hippie-love childhood. See, my parents were actually cool and I grew up listening to records like Santana, Sly and the Family Stone, Steppenwolf. I can picture my mom rocking out in our soccer van every time during the part that goes, "Mr. Mo ( Read more... )

I am feeling guilty about my rant about the Killers. So I have a confession to make ( Read more... )

Who likes The Killers? I do ... but something about them has always seemed a little fishy or Faustian or teeny-bopper-y. I want to like them a lot more, but for some reason I just don't. A lot of other folks seem to feel the same way. I was very amused in today's Coming Distractions, where Rachel Leibrock expressed a similar view:

Death becomes ( Read more... )