I hate my life, I hate myself. I hate everything about me. There's nothing to like, just look at me. I love Kayla but she doesn't love me back and I have a suspisicon that she doesn't care. Don't really blame her. I was a bad boyfriend anyways, there are so many better guys out there than me. Breaking up w/me was prbly the smartest decision ( Read more... )

I'm back now...alot of shit has been going on....first I was in command 33, my unit, when it was attacked by, who else, agent kerra. I managed to slip out but now I got alot going on with that. Oh joy, Kayla has a new boyfriend :'(. I sorta figured she would forget about me and move on...who would want a peice of shit like me? Nobody, that's ( Read more... )

I never realized, until now, how lonely I am. I'm sitting here in my friend's house, I have nowhere to go, and nobody to love me. I want to end it right now...just take on of my knives and slash away the pain. I want Kayla back more than anything right now and I'm willing to do anything to get her back, even though she hates me now. What do I ( Read more... )

Ok, so things kinda blew up with my mom tonight, and I got kicked out THANK GOD. I couldn't take her shit anymore and I was sick of her. She was the one driving me crazy, not my job, not Kayla (certianly not Kayla!), it was her! I am so glad I am out of there, and I am not going back. I'm getting money, getting an apartment, and I'm gonna laugh ( Read more... )

I AM NOT A BAD PERSON!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Kayla, I'm so sry...
-Aaron

Let me tell you people who have someone something...you are so fucking lucky. You actually have ppl who love and care about u, and ppl who will be w/u for a long time...I have nobody...I'm apparently not good enough for neone.
-Aaron

Well, it's another shitty morning. I don't know what it is, but I wake up feeling like shit, but when I talk to Kayla it make me feel a helluva lot better. I love her so damn much, I'd rather be dead then be like this, but I promised that I wouldn't do that. ::cries:: I don't know what to do. It makes me sound weak, I know, but it's the damn ( Read more... )

Well, Kayla's ok...thank God, I was so worried. Turns out she had to go to piano and she didn't have time to say goodbye. When she got back, I let her vent to me and I cried for her. I love her very very much, and I wish I could take away all her pain. I want to be with her to be her strength and support. I love yo u with all my heart Kayla!-

I know I'm working on not being sad all the time but I have to get this out. I'm not good enough for anyone. Nobody wants me, and those who I am good enough for (not many) don't want me. I'm never going to find someone. I love Kayla with all my heart and it's killing me that I can't have her, and now i'm worried about her b/c she told me she ( Read more... )

Well, I got back from the doctors today, good news tho, my blood pressure's down to 100/60 and I've lost 5 pounds. ^_^ Bad part is that the Dr. saw my cuts so now I have to see an Air Force shrink in addition to Greenich x_x ( Read more... )