Hello my name is Bryan and I'm not an alcoholic, I just play one on TV.

You know I really hate the fact that just because someone drinks a lot, pukes, fucks someone that looks like Winston Churchill, passes out, pisses their pants, then wakes up and does it all again is called an alcoholic... I'd call them a pretty fucking cool dude.

Yea... no one ( Read more... )

I have seen hell... and hell is Ikea.

Ikea. i*key*ya (n) - Evil fucking place that sells demonic torture devices thinly veiled as Swedish Furniture. example; "I hate Brad, so I'm buying him some Ikea shit for christmas. HAVE FUN ASSHOLE!"

I've been to hell and come back with a backache and sore hands... and hell resides in Elizabeth NJ (there's a ( Read more... )

I'm very good at one thing in life... and that one thing is hurting myself. Whether it be falling in a parking lot and spraining my ankle, punching a brick wall and breaking my finger, shattering a glass by accident and driving the shards deep into my hand while washing it, having massive attacks of vertigo, or even just having a headache so bad i ( Read more... )

The words "Big floppy Donkey Dick" send me into a giggle fit.

I just felt that you all should know that.

Cold dawn of a brand new mourning
a lifetime turned to dust
I kind of liked your screaming
It just reminds me of your lust

(chorus)
You're gasping and shaking
(this is the sound that silence makes)
I'm wanting and aching
(I am the path destruction takes)
You're screaming and bleeding
(This is the path corruption takes)
In darkness and silence
(I am ( Read more... )

I'm... well I'm really disgusting.

Lisa: I like Plinko
CgsBhaar: every college kid loves Bob Barker
CgsBhaar: he's like the uncle that didn't touch you at thanksgiving that you kinda wanted to... in a weird way
WhimsicalEclipse: he's retiring

We then go on to speak about why Stoners love The Price is Right.

CgsBhaar: cuz i was gonna say, stoners LOVE the ( Read more... )

10 Reasons I don't like myself... an exploration of self.

So instead of insulting other people... as is my norm, i've decided to turn my highly critical microscope on myself... since people seem to think I only laugh at others (which is really mostly true) I am about to prove I can laugh at myself.

1. I hate how fucking awesome I am.

Ok... that was ( Read more... )

"The Fallen"

How can you control
what you can't see?
How can you name
something that shouldn't be?
Don't turn your back now
on the future
Because we're coming up
quickly from behind.

(chorus)
Tear the buildings down
(We're the fallen)
Bring society to the underground
Tear the buildings down
(We're the fallen)
Watch the fires burn
Inside our hearts.
We will not be ( Read more... )

I was talking to my friend jess's away message... and I'm a retard

CgsBhaar: I'm excited, I'm going to see Tool tonight
CgsBhaar: then I'm gonna go home and play with my tool.
CgsBhaar: by that I mean screwdriver
CgsBhaar: so I can screw things
CgsBhaar: I love screwing things... boards, walls, doors... I'll screw any piece of wood around me
CgsBhaar: my ( Read more... )

I'm so angry I could puke right now. As most of you know, my friend and Daddy Jayson Samual Conrad passed on in July, and I was in the midst of putting together a Charity event in his name, but due to my life getting so insane lately, I've had to put it on the backburner until I get some other stuff sorted out... like moving, new jobs... stuff like ( Read more... )