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There was a commercial on for Lover's Lane... what the fuck is a "Romance Specialist"? Is that anything like a Sandwich Artist? Honestly, how fucking inept to you have to be to not point frustrated couples in the right direction when you're working in a store full of lingire and sex toys ( Read more... )

at work, talking about fake celebrity myspace accounts:

Rachael: I think there's something in the terms of service about not making fake accounts.
Me: Huh. I wonder what they'll do about that fake Jesus account?
Rachael: I don't think it applies to "ficticious" characters.
Me: He's not ficticious! He's a historical figure!
Rachael: Okay, but I ( Read more... )

In reality, this journal entry is just the propagation of yet another mundane meme plucked from my friends list, for better or for worse. All questions are asked by gomer43, but for the sake of my own amusement, we're going to pretend it's really James Lipton.

Also, forgive me the name Inside the Blogger's Studio.


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Alright, so tell me that this isn't the best idea for an album ever.

In short, it's a concept album where I, thinking myself to be the greatest musician in history, go back in time with the help of the phonebooth time machine from Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure (or the DeLorean from Back to the Future) and talk a bunch of shit to various famous ( Read more... )

On the way to the mall today, my friend Adam and I were discussing the numbers of a googol and a googolplex, after a ridiculous conversation concerning what we'd do with that much money. We talked of buying city blocks and starting non-profit organizations (and of curing everyone in Africa of AIDS, fucking them all, and starting a new herpes ( Read more... )

Concerning "Merry Christmas!" vs. "Happy Holidays ( Read more... )

Imagine for a second that Hell exists. However, it is not Hell as you know it. There's no sulfur, there's no lake of fire, there's no dark prince sitting upon a throne of skulls. Imagine that Hell is just an extension of life; an incorporation of your daily activities and rituals into an eternity of damnation. Death came quick, but the next day is ( Read more... )

gomer43 just goaded me into doing one of these internet memes. Usually I'd just be all, "pft, I'm too good for an internet meme, so y'all can tag some other sucker," but I haven't updated my journal in a couple weeks. Plus, this one's about music, and I'll use any excuse to namedrop some bands.

List seven songs you are into right now. No matter what the ( Read more... )

There was some CSI ripoff show on TV that Steph and I were watching a couple nights ago, where they were investigating a string of murders that were perpetrated by a video game junkie using skills he garnered from a game called Murder 1: San Fransisco (which, judging by the name and the look of it on the show, was obviously based on Grand Theft ( Read more... )