I just wrote this who long deep entry that explained how I felt, but LJ is stupid and it didn’t get saved. So I will try again but its just not gonna be the same ( Read more... )

damn, the more i think the more reasons i can think of why she shouldnt leave me. i could make a list 10 miles long, but thats not what she needs. but tonight i realized one HUGE one. when i talked to her it made me sooooooooooooooooo happy to hear about her day. just to hear these little stupid things or thigns that happened. i have always loved ( Read more... )

i have a million things just trying to pop out of my head! there is so much i want to say and type. i had a million feelings run throught my head today. after school i pretty much sat in this chair and felt sick to my stomach, i couldnt move or do anyhting. i finally decided to call shayna. she was so happy. i dont know why, but it aslo made me ( Read more... )

she just called and tried to call it off like i knew she would. and i said OK and was very calm and didnt make a big deal at all. but then she started to yell and be mean and lost her temper with me for no reason! and i kept telling her, and tried to calm her down, but she wouldnt listen and kept being mean. she made me cry cuz i had just wanted to ( Read more... )

sorry i couldnt wait. i need to tyoe or do something to distract me. i hope she calls soon. i kinda have a feeling she is gonna call and say she cant today for some reason... i hope that dosent happen. if i dont see her soon she will TOTALLY block me from her mind. i am already so close to that already, just a few more days and i will be gone to ( Read more... )

here i sit. i have a million things i could and should do, but cant. shayna is at the doctor and is gonna call me when she is leaving so i can pick her up. i am sooo excited. i know she dsoent really care. infact if i called it off she wouldnt mind at all i dont think. but i am gonna try to fix that. i need to open her eyes to teh truth. not to ME ( Read more... )

well last night i talked to shayna and i felt a little better untill it was time to hang up. i tould her i loved her and she said "i know you do" which she has been saying for a while, so i finally asked if she still loved me, she said " i dont know" ( Read more... )

today i finally broke down and did it. afer school i ran down to my car and drove as fast as i could to shaynas work. as i got out of my car i saw a short girl from that back who looked like shayna and i ran really really fast. im glad she didnt see me cuz as i got up next to her i saw it was someone i didnt know. so i then went in and asked some ( Read more... )

im not angry ne more...just to let u know...well not really really really angry like b4

im sitting here crying!! last night she said she was here when i need to tlak...and i need to and i called her and she wouldnt!!! i know she is with him but she could still talk to me! thats a lot u lied to me!! i guess i dont mean ne hting to you!!!!!!! i want to go kill myself