I feel sick.. I think thursday mornings are going to be that way indefiantly.. from lack of sleep as I stay up til 9am.. usually not sleeping for 24hrs... yesterday was a good yet wierd day.. I hung out with jake.. we decided to vege out and not leave the couch unless in dire need. it was wierd because it just seemed we were more cuddly than normal ( Read more... )

it was all so awesome.. and then on the way home he said boy rob and chris are really into him.. and I realized that this too shall pass.. because I scenced jeallousy brewing. Then I spoke, sealing the fate of what we had.. but at least I'm single. I knew he was dissapointed about how chipper and exuberent I was about saying I was single when I ( Read more... )

wow how fast things change. I woke up this morning.. went home.. took a sleeping pill, went back to bed to do my 1 as to 9 am shift... woke up about 4.. then I went to walmart and my tire blew up. it sucked because it took half my rent to fix it. BAH! Oh well..

so I had a wierd dream.. I drempt that Jake's ex Ashley was a hermaidite and I was going down on her. it was suppose to be an orgy but noone else joined in. After I sucked her cock people started talking about thier break up... i felt really bad for her.. I'm sure that what those people were saying about her.. shad has thought about me. Shad ( Read more... )

Oh man... What an awesome day... Finally FINALLY someone got fired from my work. And I was there to pick up my day.. so I have a full time job once more.. Davids going to look into switching shit so i can work with ray... on wensday... I'm so happy about it... and then the second and even more awesome thing was Jake came to visit me at work. I ( Read more... )

It breaks my heart. I knew it all, but comming face to face with others demons... it breaks me apart. At least I got a lovely reminder as to why I don't see certain people on certain days ( Read more... )

I love being in good moods. Today I went to go hang out with my friend who is a very high stress and loves me because she can bitch and moan to me and I'm still willing to listen. Anyhow I said about how I'm not going to look negitivly for now.. and she switched her tune. Like everytime she started to complain she'd stop herself. Remind herself ( Read more... )

so, I went out with jake and kelly, a few other people. I was happy as hell. I was so happy I slammed a beer... it took me two drinks but me, with beer I'm a sipper.. I got told I was cute.. and I feel cute.. they also said I looked happy which they hadn't seen in a very long time.. and even today I'm happy.. but I feel attractive and since I've ( Read more... )

I love being me. I know sometimes it sucks but i wouldn't really want to be anyone else. I've spent a lot of time dancing today rather than cleaning. Today I pushed away all my anger, resentment, ect. It has been such a good day. Last night noone ever came to relive me from work and it was my friday. Not to big of a deal. I called my boss and about ( Read more... )

My dog loves watching me dance... I don't dance as much as I used to.. it used to be my release.. I've started doing it agian.. dance away everything.. and I have someone in my life that actually loves it when I dance.. no matter how bad I may dance.. Today is a happy day.. even though the pain of lupus is creaping up on me.. and I have no money ( Read more... )