The hardest part of being a dad with skronky brain cancer is dealing with the kid.  I mean, I'm getting better, and my wife and I are both calm, quiet adults.  Not the eight-year-old daughter.  She! is! all! over! the! place!  Yesterday I was relieved that she was pissed off about our cat, for hours.  She's been calm and controlled for weeks, but ( Read more... )

The tumor is going to be treated by radiation therapy, daily, five days a week, for weeks. The tumor can't be removed - it's a big fat weird tendril in my brain, and removing it would remove quite a bit of speech, memory, maybe arm motion. Nuh-uh. Keep it, but whomp it down so it'll stop growing, and perhaps actually shrink ( Read more... )

Hey! There's a choking, dying dog out there going on forever! Choking, dying...! My god who's goddamn dog is...oh, it's a fox. A fox barking, normally, for a fox. Those wild, enormously tailed red foxes, gorgeous, graceful, sounding like gigantic slowed and amplified tapes of chihuahuas choking on baby pacifiers. So, yeah, it's not evolution ( Read more... )

So, tomorrow morning I'm scheduled for radiation fix to my brain.

Now, of course, I'm thinking that I'll get some kind of normality back, I'll get my brain fixed after years of long, slow downfall that really hit the pits a couple weeks ago.

But I also feel like the personality I am now is going to vanish. The weird stupid person I've been over ( Read more... )

I'm going to have irradiation, or pre-irradiation exam, on Monday. Even if it means being sick as a dog for an hour, or a day, following the treatment, it means I'll get a brain back. Possibly. We'll see. It'll also bring the brain swelling down and bring back my intelligence in ways I cannot comprehend right now. Looking forward to this, with ( Read more... )

I'm amazed by how many friends and family are on LJ. I innocently didn't suspect all of you! So ( Read more... )

I've got the glowing green bloogers in my eyes. I've got the really stupid relentlessly bad lack of thinking, period. I can't write! I couldn't write before! Jeez, how long has this weird shit been building up ( Read more... )

I'm home from the hospital, and I'm on steroids to keep my cancerous brain swelling down. Which keeps me excited! Which keeps me anti-depressed! Steroids fucking rule! They fucking rock!Sorry. My state of mind with cancer is absolutely fucking opposite of what I was in a few weeks ago when I was still healthy, after my dad died. Now, my brain ( Read more... )

Thanks for your support. It's nice to hear from all of you. I've been falling away from LJ lately, moving toward talking to friends and family, and I'll probably continue that. But on the other hand, recovering from brain problems in a hospital, and being able to type again and think in sentences, is nifty-keeno ( Read more... )

Last Saturday, a week ago, I woke up from a nap unable to read or speak correctly. I tried to read email, but English text was deeply mysterious. I told my wife this, and she immediately called an ambulance ( Read more... )