Fuck. Did we ever move out of the House of Elronds? I can't remember. There's a lot of sushi in the fridge, so probably not.

STARDUST FAMILY MEETING
~*~

( Ok, it was longer than I realized. )

The little witch has gone off to "look for Bela", by which I can only assume that she's looking for Mandos. I couldn't figure out how the hell she found out about the Halls in the first place, seeing as she's never so much as seen a dwarf in her insanely short life... until I found canonical text lying all over her room. In this house, we leave ( Read more... )

I hate you. If I could condemn you to eternal Hellfire, I would. But I can't. So I'm giving you the finger. Right now. Thanks.

Love,
Me

HE DRANK IT!! He drank it all! It was the girl's fault, but now the baby will be soon! The boy is a fool, but the girl is to blame!! STONE HER! It's wicked, WICKED ( Read more... )

Thanks to Rivendell's favourite hypergrowth demon-children, the back of our house is missing. Celeborn had banned Bela from the house after the boy blocked the hall toilet with a severed orc head, but he stuck around in the backyard with Claude in the My Little Pony tent, killing and roasting Celeborn's pets for "food" and occasionally "in the ( Read more... )

It's late, but I was away and it's not as if any of my FIVE children gave me anything, so to get a Father's Day present at all should be good enough for anyone.

Happy belated Father's Day, Florence. I have no memory of you whatsoever and your desert pygmy story is more than a little dodgy, but you two are the only people to ever lay biological ( Read more... )

I've been gone. Now I'm back. I might talk about it later. To keep the bored insomniacs busy, here's a sample of things to come, outside-project-wise. Blasphemy, it burns so good.

( Not one, but TWO dead authors spinning in their graves now. Actually, one is spinning, the other is probably eating Cheetos or something. )

Since we now have two sets of twins in the immediate family, "the twins" is no longer an adequate term for reference. So, from now on we'll have the A&K twins, Absinthe and Kubrick, and the B&B twins, Bela and Bruschetta Caratima.

To illustrate, an example: The B&B twins are freaking me the fuck out. Meaning, clearly, that Bela and Bruschetta ( Read more... )

Let's recap. (I'll do this with links later.)

Celeborn started blowing up like a balloon.

His, her water broke after a few days of pregnancy. A Galadriel helped with the birth. Despite the intense strangeness of the situation, the baby came out fine. It's a girl. I was thoroughly freaked out by the whole process. Celeborn drank milkshakes ( Read more... )