As we spoke in person the words 'I don't love her' rose in my mind though the memory of her lingers with me each moment of each day. We speak briefly on the phone and I hear her sadness. She says she has a lot going on - in her life and in her head. I wonder if this is the style of person she is ( Read more... )

PEOPLE COME INTO YOUR LIFE FOR A REASON ( Read more... )

My mother used to tell me a little story when I was young. Her stories were always interesting because she would put voices on the characters. This story those was a bout a snail - I remember he had a lisp ( Read more... )

In a moment. In traffic. In a split second. I had a desire. It was to vacate my car. Leave it sitting unmanned in a centre traffic lane. And walk. To where I did not care. I imagined sitting on a grassy knoll. Maybe I would take the guitar that lay in my boot. It would amuse me. Nothing else crossed my mind. Those I love. My work. The ( Read more... )

The tablets are fine. I even remember to take them now. I still see triggers, I feel them. The clouds are a short distance away. My mood is low yet my energy is high. It feels unusual. As if only an umbrella is between me and the clouds ( Read more... )

Our backs were against the pole, the four unwanted. The others, the wretched, danced in front of us. Their maypole ribbons teasing us, brushing past our faces, flaunting the fact that they were dancing and we were mere ribbon holders once they had exhausted their moves. The teacher, their ringleader, stood nearby proud of her achievement ( Read more... )

Hmmmm, 7 days of medication and nothing new. I know they said it may take a while to kick in. And what was I hoping for? An instant cure? I wish. The hollowness is still there. My only comfort, the only time I do not feel so lonely is when my partner is with me. She has a magic that makes the bad days go away. Yet they also return, ( Read more... )

I seem to be thanking you a lot. You have been there for me to lean on. Doing things when I felt I couldn't. You are wonderful - gorgeous - and amazing. I just hope I do not overuse this, for I am truly thankful for what you are doing for me. I appreciate it immensely.

I cannot be the person I was a year and a half ago. I hate that person. I cannot be that shell. I cannot live to that expectation. I cannot live beyond that pressure. To return would destroy me ( Read more... )

When does your responsibility end? Today I have been to immigration for my ex. For some reason I was not as prepared as I normally would be. In general I would have every possible scenario played out in my head. Each would have a suitable response before I even entered a situation. Not today ( Read more... )