I feel so unsettled. I feel like a stranger in my own house. What I once found comforting is now filled with chaotic emotion. I need to make decisions and I don't feel equipped to do that ( Read more... )

Reality and I have been having this argument lately ( Read more... )

To me, Love and Hate are on the same side of the spectrum and what you were talking about,(being able to control this stupid carbon based, chemical-bathed meat body to the point of regulating mind-consuming emotion)or, simple, clear, cognitive operation, without emotional reactions, would be on the other side of my spectrum. So, simply, feel/not ( Read more... )

I really need to do this. I feel self-centered, but, I really need to be able to see myself accurately ( Read more... )

Ok, some questions for myself... What moves me? When I asked this of myself before, I was thinking. The question in itself implies feeling. I think I was not really reaching deep enough. I am far more emotional than I am willing to show ( Read more... )

I've been thinking a lot lately about what is important to me. I have had this feeling that I only have a surface view of how I really feel about things. I need to confront this because I have a feeling that maybe I don't know myself and to others that know me, I appear dishonest to myself. I don't know if that is true or just one person's ( Read more... )

HELP!  I need a retreat.  I am soooo tired of the daily grind.  I need to find a way to make money that doesn't take up so much time, or is more flexible than being riveted to a chair with a surgically implanted headset.  I would rather be shoveling shit on a ranch.  Having my son live with me is a good enough goal to keep me going, however, I will ( Read more... )

My boss has canceled our 1 on 1 for the second time this week. Hmmmm. I wonder if he's given up on me. Probably. I am in a madd rush now to think of some new way of making money (ways) that don't involve illegal things. I can sell art. I can help KJ with the glass blowing. Um, (drawing blanks). I wish I could stop working for other people ( Read more... )

I know that life is presenting opportunities for me to grow.  I know there are so many things that I need to catch up with in order for me to live this moment forward.  So, many things...  Sometimes I just get so overwhelmed with things.  I know I'm thinking of it as a whole ball of wax instead of the little pellets in a pile I know it is.  One ( Read more... )

I think it prudent to say, first, that I condoned everything that has gone on though I still feel uneasy about it ( Read more... )