Fic: Steady As She Goes (21/86)
Title: Steady As She Goes (21/86)
Author: dak
Word Count: 1892 this part; [38,378 overall]
Summary for Whole: After an accidental shooting at the station, Gene struggles to keep his team from tearing themselves apart.
Summary this Part: The team starts to reorganize.
Rating: still Blue-ish Cortina, uhm, what's slightly darker than blue?
Warnings: angst, swearing, violence, violent imagery, minor drug use, mild sexual situations, self-harm for whole
Spoilers: none here; see each chapter for specific spoiler warnings
Pairing: mild Sam/Annie, Sam/Maya
Disclaimer: Belongs to BBC/Kudos
A/N: I can't believe this is at 21 parts already. Sheesh. How'd that happen?
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 Part 17 Part 18 Part 19 Part 20 Part 21 Part 22 Part 23 Part 24 Part 25 Part 26 Part 27 Part 28 Part 29 Part 30 Part 31 Part 32 Part 33 Part 34 Part 35 Part 36 Part 37 Part 38 Part 39 Part 40 Part 41 Part 42 Part 43 Part 44 Part 45 Part 46 Part 47 Part 48 Part 49 Part 50 Part 51 Part 52 Part 53 Part 54 Part 55 Part 56 Part 57 Part 58 Part 59 Part 60 Part 61 Part 62 Part 63 Part 64 Part 65 Part 66 Part 67 Part 68 Part 69 Part 70 Part 71 Part 72 Part 73 Part 74 Part 75 Part 76 Part 77 Part 78 Part 79 Part 80 Part 81 Part 82 Part 83 Part 84 Part 85 Part 86
Chris turned over in his sleep, banging his arm on the night stand as he flung it out unconsciously. The small jolt woke him almost immediately. Chris sighed and readjusted himself again. He lay on his back, gazing up at the dark ceiling and rubbing one hand over the new scar on his belly.
He tried closing his eyes a few times, but it was no use. No matter what he did he just couldn’t fall back asleep. Chris stumbled out of bed and shuffled downstairs to the kitchen.
Trying not to wake his parents, Chris flicked on the kitchen light and started preparing himself a nice, healthy fry-up. The good thing about still living with his mum and dad was never having to worry about an empty cupboard. It made the constant taunts from Ray almost worth it.
Chris scooped the food onto a plate and sat down at the table. As he stared at his midnight snack Chris suddenly realized how much he wasn’t hungry.
He poked it with a fork, took a few little bites, but mostly let it sit. Lately, whenever he looked at food it reminded him of the nearly inedible hospital grub he’d had to eat for so many weeks. Whenever he thought about the hospital food he thought about the hospital. With its pale yellow walls, stiff beds, and mostly unattractive nurses it had hardly provided the greatest comfort during his long stay. Whenever he thought about the hospital he thought about DI Tyler still stuck inside. Chris didn’t mind a good lay about once in awhile, but even he got bored lying in those awful beds all day. DI Tyler loved keeping busy. Always moving, always working, he was. For a man like the Boss, being stuck in hospital must be an absolute nightmare. At least he was awake now.
Chris finally pushed the plate away and lit up one of his dad’s ciggies instead. Over the past few weeks Ray had slowly and reluctantly filled him in on the events following his shooting. Chris had been greatly taken aback by how much the incident had affected the Boss. Chris knew DI Tyler had taken a bit of a shining to him, in a purely work-related sense, but Chris had always thought he cancelled out much of that affection by acting such a div most times.
Chris let the ashes drop on the table, the ashtray being on the counter and Chris being too lazy to fetch it. As he watched the flakes fall he remembered what had happened that day in the Collator’s. He remembered hearing shouts in the corridor, then opening the door to see a large, frenzied face. The next part was a bit hazy, but he could recall feeling cold, very sleepy, and hearing DI Tyler’s voice ordering him to stay awake.
Chris raised the cigarette to his lips then noticed he had let most of it burn down to the filter without even smoking it. He crawled out of the kitchen chair and loped over to the counter where he stubbed out the butt in the ashtray. He knew his mum would throw a fit if he left a plate of perfectly good food "rotting," as she might say, on the table all night, so he scraped the food into the bin and rinsed the dish in the sink.
He dragged his feet back upstairs to his room, all the while thinking about DI Tyler and how his Boss wouldn’t be in this situation if he hadn’t cared so much about Chris.
*
Ray pulled up to his house 8:45 sharp, just as he had done each day since Chris returned to work. Chris kissed his mum goodbye and joined Ray in the car. He buckled his seat belt and noticed the large amount of cigarette butts in the ashtray. Those hadn’t been there yesterday.
"Have a good night?" Chris asked warily as Ray peeled away from the curb.
"Yeah." Ray clenched his jaw shut. Chris swallowed nervously.
"Picked up Roy Martin then?" He tapped his fingers on his knee.
"Yeah." Ray stared straight ahead at the road, but noticed Chris shift in his seat. "Not like you have to see ‘im or anything," he tried to say kindly.
"Yeah," Chris replied. " ‘S good we got ‘im though."
"Yeah." Ray drove through a stop sign. Chris pretended not to notice.
"So, you seen the Boss lately?"
Ray didn’t answer.
"Ray? Summit wrong?"
"Hm? What. No. What’d you say?"
Chris pulled at his jacket. "Jus’ wanted to know if you’ve seen the Boss is all."
"Oh." Ray noticeably tensed. "Yeah."
"He alright?"
"No more than usual."
Chris nodded. They drove the rest of the way in silence.
*
Gene was locked in his office. Ray wanted to speak to him, needed to speak to him, but he dare not knock on the door. He knew Gene was awake. Once in awhile he could see him pace behind the blinds. What scared Ray was the lack of noise coming from the room. When the Guv was angry he would yell and curse. When he was very angry he would yell, curse, and throw things. When he was beyond anger, beyond rage, beyond hatred, he would get very, very quiet. Ray had only seen him in such a state once before, three years ago when a serial kiddie rapist had got off on a minor technicality. Gene had gone very quiet after the trial. The next day the suspect had shown up at the hospital claiming he’d had an accident at home. Two days later he’d packed up and left Manchester for good.
Ray had checked on Roy Martin. The man was still in his cell and still in one piece. Ray wondered how long that would last.
"Carling!" Gene bellowed from behind the closed doors. Ray stubbed out his cigarette and attempted to hide his nervousness as he stepped into the Guv’s room.
Gene had his back to the door, hands in his pockets, staring at his The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly poster.
"Yes Guv?"
Gene didn’t turn. "Last night at St. Mary’s...I was there cos Tyler...had an accident."
Gene had clearly rehearsed this several times before calling for Ray.
"I-I know Guv."
Gene finally spun around, leveling Ray with a questioning look.
"I went to see ‘im, after you left."
"You did."
"Yes Guv."
"How was he?"
Ray looked at his feet. "Not well."
Gene turned to the side, staring down at his desk. "You tell Chris?"
"No sir."
Gene nodded. "Good. Don’t. Been through enough lately." Gene pulled out his cigarette pack. "Don’t tell anyone. What happened wasn’t his fault. Was those damn doctors, but people may not understand that." He lit a fag and offered one to Ray. Ray shook his head and Gene tossed the pack on his desk. " ‘Specially the Super."
"Right Guv."
"I need you to help me interrogate Martin this morning."
"Course Guv." Ray thought back a moment. "Weren’t you doin’ that las’ night?"
Gene mumbled something Ray couldn’t quite catch. "Sorry sir?"
Gene spoke a little louder. "Phyllis wouldn’t let me." He sat down at his desk and pretended to read a file. "Said I was in no state to interview one of her prisoners." Gene set the file down. "Sodding bird probably saved me career."
Ray waited in silence to be officially dismissed. Gene waited, too. Ray could sense he was deciding what to say next.
"Half hour we’ll take ‘im to Lost and Found."
"Yes sir."
Gene nodded and Ray made for the door. "And Ray?"
"Guv?"
"Cartwright in yet?"
Ray peeked through the door blinds to see Annie removing her coat and chatting with Chris. "Yes sir."
"Send her in."
Ray nodded and left the room. He walked to Annie feeling the same way he did when he had to tell a wife her old man wouldn’t be coming home for supper anymore. He didn’t know why. Tyler wasn’t her husband and he certainly wasn’t dead.
"Mornin’ Ray," she smiled cheerfully. Annie had been in such a better mood these past two days, ever since Tyler had woken up. Ray had missed her cheerful manner. He knew he’d be missing it again shortly.
"Mornin’ Cartwright. Guv wants to see yeh."
"Needs his tea and Garibaldi’s does he?" She happily joked. Ray forced a smile as Annie dropped her purse at her desk and knocked on the Guv’s door.
*
Gene helped Annie fall into a chair. She was usually so strong Gene sometimes forgot she was a bird, forgot that she wouldn’t always hide her emotions like he always tried to do. He offered her a tissue but Annie refused.
"He did...he seemed, a bit sad last night, but I, I didn’t think..."
Gene sat on the edge of his desk. "Neither did I luv."
"Does everyone else know?"
"Just Ray. Fewer the better I should think."
Annie nodded in agreement and took a deep breath. She would not cry in front of her DCI. She would not cry in front of her DCI.
"Only reason I wanted to tell you..." Gene trailed off and looked away.
"Yes sir?"
Gene kept his hands clenched on the edge of the desk. "They want to put ‘im under psychiatric observation."
A hole opened up in Annie’s stomach and all her hope went tumbling in. Gene looked her straight in the eye. "You an’ I both know that wouldn’t be the best thing for our Dorothy, would it?"
"What would you like me to do, sir? I don’t think I’ll be able to convince his doctors he doesn’t need it..."
Gene crossed his arms. "I want you to do it."
"Excuse me?...Sir?"
"His evaluation. Observation. Whatever they want to call it. I want you to do it."
"But..."
"You’ve got a degree in psycho, don’t yeh?"
Annie shifted in her seat. "Just a BA sir. I’m hardly a...a qualified psychiatrist."
"Those quacks’ve poked an’ prodded his cracked head enough the past few weeks, doing more harm than good in my opinion, which is the only one that matters when it comes to my men. If Tyler has to be examined I want one of me own to do it an’ you’re the only one ‘round here who’s even remotely qualified Flash Knickers. So I don’t want to hear any guff ‘bout you not wantin’ the job." Gene had struggled, but managed to keep his voice down. He didn’t mean to get angry with the plonk, but she had to see how important this was to him. To all of them.
"I understand sir."
Gene nodded and stood. "Good girl. I want you over there soon’s you leave my office. ‘Fore they sick any of their own goons on ‘im."
"Yes Guv." Annie stood up, hiding her shaking hands. "I’ll leave right away."
"Oh an’ Cartwright? Any of those white coats give you trouble jus’ flash ‘em a smile then knee ‘im in the meat and veg. Okay?"
"Will do sir." Annie left the office and Gene followed right behind. He watched as she gathered her coat and purse without a word to anyone else. As soon as she left Gene turned to Ray.
"Right then Raymondo. ‘Bout time for a bit of friendly questioning, don’t you think?"
"I couldn’t agree more Guv."
____________
Part 22
Author: dak
Word Count: 1892 this part; [38,378 overall]
Summary for Whole: After an accidental shooting at the station, Gene struggles to keep his team from tearing themselves apart.
Summary this Part: The team starts to reorganize.
Rating: still Blue-ish Cortina, uhm, what's slightly darker than blue?
Warnings: angst, swearing, violence, violent imagery, minor drug use, mild sexual situations, self-harm for whole
Spoilers: none here; see each chapter for specific spoiler warnings
Pairing: mild Sam/Annie, Sam/Maya
Disclaimer: Belongs to BBC/Kudos
A/N: I can't believe this is at 21 parts already. Sheesh. How'd that happen?
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 Part 17 Part 18 Part 19 Part 20 Part 21 Part 22 Part 23 Part 24 Part 25 Part 26 Part 27 Part 28 Part 29 Part 30 Part 31 Part 32 Part 33 Part 34 Part 35 Part 36 Part 37 Part 38 Part 39 Part 40 Part 41 Part 42 Part 43 Part 44 Part 45 Part 46 Part 47 Part 48 Part 49 Part 50 Part 51 Part 52 Part 53 Part 54 Part 55 Part 56 Part 57 Part 58 Part 59 Part 60 Part 61 Part 62 Part 63 Part 64 Part 65 Part 66 Part 67 Part 68 Part 69 Part 70 Part 71 Part 72 Part 73 Part 74 Part 75 Part 76 Part 77 Part 78 Part 79 Part 80 Part 81 Part 82 Part 83 Part 84 Part 85 Part 86
Chris turned over in his sleep, banging his arm on the night stand as he flung it out unconsciously. The small jolt woke him almost immediately. Chris sighed and readjusted himself again. He lay on his back, gazing up at the dark ceiling and rubbing one hand over the new scar on his belly.
He tried closing his eyes a few times, but it was no use. No matter what he did he just couldn’t fall back asleep. Chris stumbled out of bed and shuffled downstairs to the kitchen.
Trying not to wake his parents, Chris flicked on the kitchen light and started preparing himself a nice, healthy fry-up. The good thing about still living with his mum and dad was never having to worry about an empty cupboard. It made the constant taunts from Ray almost worth it.
Chris scooped the food onto a plate and sat down at the table. As he stared at his midnight snack Chris suddenly realized how much he wasn’t hungry.
He poked it with a fork, took a few little bites, but mostly let it sit. Lately, whenever he looked at food it reminded him of the nearly inedible hospital grub he’d had to eat for so many weeks. Whenever he thought about the hospital food he thought about the hospital. With its pale yellow walls, stiff beds, and mostly unattractive nurses it had hardly provided the greatest comfort during his long stay. Whenever he thought about the hospital he thought about DI Tyler still stuck inside. Chris didn’t mind a good lay about once in awhile, but even he got bored lying in those awful beds all day. DI Tyler loved keeping busy. Always moving, always working, he was. For a man like the Boss, being stuck in hospital must be an absolute nightmare. At least he was awake now.
Chris finally pushed the plate away and lit up one of his dad’s ciggies instead. Over the past few weeks Ray had slowly and reluctantly filled him in on the events following his shooting. Chris had been greatly taken aback by how much the incident had affected the Boss. Chris knew DI Tyler had taken a bit of a shining to him, in a purely work-related sense, but Chris had always thought he cancelled out much of that affection by acting such a div most times.
Chris let the ashes drop on the table, the ashtray being on the counter and Chris being too lazy to fetch it. As he watched the flakes fall he remembered what had happened that day in the Collator’s. He remembered hearing shouts in the corridor, then opening the door to see a large, frenzied face. The next part was a bit hazy, but he could recall feeling cold, very sleepy, and hearing DI Tyler’s voice ordering him to stay awake.
Chris raised the cigarette to his lips then noticed he had let most of it burn down to the filter without even smoking it. He crawled out of the kitchen chair and loped over to the counter where he stubbed out the butt in the ashtray. He knew his mum would throw a fit if he left a plate of perfectly good food "rotting," as she might say, on the table all night, so he scraped the food into the bin and rinsed the dish in the sink.
He dragged his feet back upstairs to his room, all the while thinking about DI Tyler and how his Boss wouldn’t be in this situation if he hadn’t cared so much about Chris.
*
Ray pulled up to his house 8:45 sharp, just as he had done each day since Chris returned to work. Chris kissed his mum goodbye and joined Ray in the car. He buckled his seat belt and noticed the large amount of cigarette butts in the ashtray. Those hadn’t been there yesterday.
"Have a good night?" Chris asked warily as Ray peeled away from the curb.
"Yeah." Ray clenched his jaw shut. Chris swallowed nervously.
"Picked up Roy Martin then?" He tapped his fingers on his knee.
"Yeah." Ray stared straight ahead at the road, but noticed Chris shift in his seat. "Not like you have to see ‘im or anything," he tried to say kindly.
"Yeah," Chris replied. " ‘S good we got ‘im though."
"Yeah." Ray drove through a stop sign. Chris pretended not to notice.
"So, you seen the Boss lately?"
Ray didn’t answer.
"Ray? Summit wrong?"
"Hm? What. No. What’d you say?"
Chris pulled at his jacket. "Jus’ wanted to know if you’ve seen the Boss is all."
"Oh." Ray noticeably tensed. "Yeah."
"He alright?"
"No more than usual."
Chris nodded. They drove the rest of the way in silence.
*
Gene was locked in his office. Ray wanted to speak to him, needed to speak to him, but he dare not knock on the door. He knew Gene was awake. Once in awhile he could see him pace behind the blinds. What scared Ray was the lack of noise coming from the room. When the Guv was angry he would yell and curse. When he was very angry he would yell, curse, and throw things. When he was beyond anger, beyond rage, beyond hatred, he would get very, very quiet. Ray had only seen him in such a state once before, three years ago when a serial kiddie rapist had got off on a minor technicality. Gene had gone very quiet after the trial. The next day the suspect had shown up at the hospital claiming he’d had an accident at home. Two days later he’d packed up and left Manchester for good.
Ray had checked on Roy Martin. The man was still in his cell and still in one piece. Ray wondered how long that would last.
"Carling!" Gene bellowed from behind the closed doors. Ray stubbed out his cigarette and attempted to hide his nervousness as he stepped into the Guv’s room.
Gene had his back to the door, hands in his pockets, staring at his The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly poster.
"Yes Guv?"
Gene didn’t turn. "Last night at St. Mary’s...I was there cos Tyler...had an accident."
Gene had clearly rehearsed this several times before calling for Ray.
"I-I know Guv."
Gene finally spun around, leveling Ray with a questioning look.
"I went to see ‘im, after you left."
"You did."
"Yes Guv."
"How was he?"
Ray looked at his feet. "Not well."
Gene turned to the side, staring down at his desk. "You tell Chris?"
"No sir."
Gene nodded. "Good. Don’t. Been through enough lately." Gene pulled out his cigarette pack. "Don’t tell anyone. What happened wasn’t his fault. Was those damn doctors, but people may not understand that." He lit a fag and offered one to Ray. Ray shook his head and Gene tossed the pack on his desk. " ‘Specially the Super."
"Right Guv."
"I need you to help me interrogate Martin this morning."
"Course Guv." Ray thought back a moment. "Weren’t you doin’ that las’ night?"
Gene mumbled something Ray couldn’t quite catch. "Sorry sir?"
Gene spoke a little louder. "Phyllis wouldn’t let me." He sat down at his desk and pretended to read a file. "Said I was in no state to interview one of her prisoners." Gene set the file down. "Sodding bird probably saved me career."
Ray waited in silence to be officially dismissed. Gene waited, too. Ray could sense he was deciding what to say next.
"Half hour we’ll take ‘im to Lost and Found."
"Yes sir."
Gene nodded and Ray made for the door. "And Ray?"
"Guv?"
"Cartwright in yet?"
Ray peeked through the door blinds to see Annie removing her coat and chatting with Chris. "Yes sir."
"Send her in."
Ray nodded and left the room. He walked to Annie feeling the same way he did when he had to tell a wife her old man wouldn’t be coming home for supper anymore. He didn’t know why. Tyler wasn’t her husband and he certainly wasn’t dead.
"Mornin’ Ray," she smiled cheerfully. Annie had been in such a better mood these past two days, ever since Tyler had woken up. Ray had missed her cheerful manner. He knew he’d be missing it again shortly.
"Mornin’ Cartwright. Guv wants to see yeh."
"Needs his tea and Garibaldi’s does he?" She happily joked. Ray forced a smile as Annie dropped her purse at her desk and knocked on the Guv’s door.
*
Gene helped Annie fall into a chair. She was usually so strong Gene sometimes forgot she was a bird, forgot that she wouldn’t always hide her emotions like he always tried to do. He offered her a tissue but Annie refused.
"He did...he seemed, a bit sad last night, but I, I didn’t think..."
Gene sat on the edge of his desk. "Neither did I luv."
"Does everyone else know?"
"Just Ray. Fewer the better I should think."
Annie nodded in agreement and took a deep breath. She would not cry in front of her DCI. She would not cry in front of her DCI.
"Only reason I wanted to tell you..." Gene trailed off and looked away.
"Yes sir?"
Gene kept his hands clenched on the edge of the desk. "They want to put ‘im under psychiatric observation."
A hole opened up in Annie’s stomach and all her hope went tumbling in. Gene looked her straight in the eye. "You an’ I both know that wouldn’t be the best thing for our Dorothy, would it?"
"What would you like me to do, sir? I don’t think I’ll be able to convince his doctors he doesn’t need it..."
Gene crossed his arms. "I want you to do it."
"Excuse me?...Sir?"
"His evaluation. Observation. Whatever they want to call it. I want you to do it."
"But..."
"You’ve got a degree in psycho, don’t yeh?"
Annie shifted in her seat. "Just a BA sir. I’m hardly a...a qualified psychiatrist."
"Those quacks’ve poked an’ prodded his cracked head enough the past few weeks, doing more harm than good in my opinion, which is the only one that matters when it comes to my men. If Tyler has to be examined I want one of me own to do it an’ you’re the only one ‘round here who’s even remotely qualified Flash Knickers. So I don’t want to hear any guff ‘bout you not wantin’ the job." Gene had struggled, but managed to keep his voice down. He didn’t mean to get angry with the plonk, but she had to see how important this was to him. To all of them.
"I understand sir."
Gene nodded and stood. "Good girl. I want you over there soon’s you leave my office. ‘Fore they sick any of their own goons on ‘im."
"Yes Guv." Annie stood up, hiding her shaking hands. "I’ll leave right away."
"Oh an’ Cartwright? Any of those white coats give you trouble jus’ flash ‘em a smile then knee ‘im in the meat and veg. Okay?"
"Will do sir." Annie left the office and Gene followed right behind. He watched as she gathered her coat and purse without a word to anyone else. As soon as she left Gene turned to Ray.
"Right then Raymondo. ‘Bout time for a bit of friendly questioning, don’t you think?"
"I couldn’t agree more Guv."
____________
Part 22