I am trying to quit smoking.  This is probably my 20th attempt.  But I feel good about it this time.  Confident, healthy, strong...convinced that the universe is on my side and my angels are beside me and there are many, many sweet blessing awaiting me if I just make it through.

Atleast, that was how I felt up until about yesterday afternoon.  ( Read more... )

Q has smeared melon all over himself and the floor.  The floor i stayed up late mopping. I am going to let it go...working on letting it go anyway.  Who cares.  It won't matter tomorrow...I don't think.  The throwing food thing everywhere though really tests my patience.  We have a tiny apartment, and there is only so much room to walk around in, ( Read more... )

I am really thankful for my friends ( Read more... )

ugh can't sleep.  Q gave me his nasty cold and we have both been restless...tossing and turning all over the bed.  We went to bed early and then I woke up with this strange cold-delirium insomnia.  Plus I got a bad sunburn today so no matter how I lay, I can't get comfortable ( Read more... )

sometimes I get really sick of how I can't stop thinking about all the things I'm not doing, or could be doing.  I'm trying to work on just being in the moment and having more compassion for myself and everything I am doing.  But it's hard.  I'm such a perfectionist about everything sometimes.  My mind just won't stop spinning out ( Read more... )

It's been a weird 24 hours.  Last night I couldn't sleep so I picked up a book I had just got (didn't know anything abou it) and stayed up until 3am reading the entire novel because after the first page, I could not put it down.  (Cormac McCarthy's "The Road").  It left me completely devastated emotionally and freaking out because I wanted to talk ( Read more... )

so many thoughts in my head

I wish I had a tape recorder hooked up to my brain.  Maybe I would remember things that were really important an hour ago, but now have slipped away.  O rmaybe it's good that I'm at a place where my thoughts just come and go and I'm not as obsessed with them as I was before.

I haven't heard from D. in a few months now and ( Read more... )

Or lack thereof.  Sometimes I just get real sick of the frantic pace of my life.  It's funny how when you're pregnant, you spend all this time laying around thinking about the baby and what it's gonna be like and then once you have the kid, you really hit the ground running.  One day, you are childless, the next, you have a baby and it's go go go ( Read more... )

hmm. I'm not so sure about this whole livejournal thing.  writing about myself to no one in particular but with the chance that any random person can read about my very, very interesting life.  Ok, working on keeping the cynicism in check. man I can't spell anymore.  That English degree sure paid off. Well, a certain mama who I truly admire ( Read more... )