i took this one in my stride and never looked over my shoulder to see what was coming,
i pushed so hard to understand what it was that made you who you are now.
i shifted and changed into what i needed to be to gain everything,
...but still i am nothing.

i conquered hard and fast and i proudly stood atop what i had built,
i sacrificed emotion to gain ( Read more... )

still lots of thing in my head. i really want to buy a house now becuase now that i have  family i want to be able to provide them with a place to grow up in. with the way things are at the moment the best thing we can do is rent until we win the lotto. it's so dis-heartening to want to be able to provide for your family only to spend 20 mins on ( Read more... )

sometimes i watch the news and i see that someone has brought a gun to work and gone to town and i'm horrified. then i got to work and remember just how justified they must have thought they were in their actions because quite frankly, bosses are just getting fuckin ruder and ruder and they are working us to the bone so they can sit back and do ( Read more... )

yup. we have to work. as a collective though we have allowed ourselves to become consumers and not the free agents of thought we long to be. let's all stop consuming goods and start consuming time with our loved ones instead. i hate the fact i have to go to work this morning. i woke up next to my beautiful April and Xavier and i couldnt have been ( Read more... )

xavier felix. 9 lb 8. BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIG BABY!!!! born at around 1:15pm on 26th of july 2008. april is the most amazing beautiful giving loving tough as nails woman to go through what she went through to have our beautiful son. i owe so much to that amazing woman. no man woman or child in my eyes is as strong and as determined as my girl.....ever. i ( Read more... )

nothing to see here....move on please.
 

a friend of mine asks me to meet her for a chai last night. here i am thinking she's got herself into another bind with her ex gf and that this should be a little bit painful for her but i can help fix it and get her back on board. i sit down pretty much loaded with things to say and try to help with and then she says "my friend has cancer. not ( Read more... )

dare you all to just tell it like it is. instead of fluffing over something and worrying about the shit we all know is only there in order to keep us interested.....i double dare...whoa....physical challenge!!!! you to just sit in it and wonder wether or not the drama is really worth it. this is in no relation to anything in particular.

just a

ok. so on the 2nd i got sick. came good a few days later. went to the wedding and got sick again straight after and i'm still sick from then. i'll be fucked if i'm sitting here at 1:30am after getting out of bed to make some tea to calm my throat down becuase for some reason my body has developed a need to swallow every 5 mins and my throat is that ( Read more... )

yesterday i am driving along and bam! it hit me... i found it. some of you know me as being pretty light and possibly easy to get along with and i would say that almost none of you know that i have a very very very deeply rooted anger inside of me that always bubbling just below the surface. i get angry at everyone else and at myself quite often ( Read more... )