The Boys of Summer
Title: The Boys of Summer
Pairings: Hanchul with a hint of Kangin/Girl! Leeteuk and Kyuhyun/Girl!Sungmin (more pairings to come)
Rating: PG-13
Status: Part 6
Summary: AU. The epic summer of 1999 told via letters from Kim Heechul to Han Geng and back.
[LETTERS 1&2]
[LETTERS 3&4]
[LETTER 5]
[LETTER 6]
[LETTER 7]
*A LETTER FROM HAN GENG TO KIM HEECHUL*
Dearest Kim Heechul (notorious arsonist and more recently, a dabbler of the forgotten art of BLOWING PEOPLE’S CEILINGS OFF TO INFINITY),
I….
I cannot….
I just…..
What were you…
Well that was half a sheet of paper down the drain.
Heechul, I have been a part of many a hackneyed plot that would usually end in your crushing, not to mention painfully devastating failure (while I get maimed in the foreground) or in rare, nearly mythical, occasions, your triumphant victory (while I, apparently because the world hates me, still get maimed in the foreground).
But usually in your crushing, painfully devastating failure.
The past has shown us nothing but tears being shed along with all manner of clothing and dignity. Walls have been reduced to dust (and yes, that was a reference to your culinary exploits of so long ago). Police reports have been filed. Proper procedures have been executed along with all manner of files, contracts, and the occasional restraining order. And yet, at what point during the planning period did someone stop to think that maybe FIREWORKS + HOMEMADE BOMBS + KIM HEECHUL does not an intact ceiling make? And by the way, please tell Kangin that I am in fact QUITE ATTACHED to my ceiling thank you very much considering that it has sheltered me, protected me, and has never failed to shield me from prying eyes and thunderstorms.
Also monsters.
And maybe some sexual predators (I’m not naming any names BUT YES YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN, YES THAT ONE, EXACTLY).
And the zombie apocalypse that has been foretold would surely happen around this year.
Zombie…
…Apocalypse.
DEAR GOD WHAT HAVE YOU DONE YOU, YOU--- YOU FIEND?? YOU EVIL, EVIL-
Shame on you, Kim Heechul, SHAAAAAAME.
I cannot-
I just-
AGGGHHHH-
I AM SO ANGRY RIGHT NOW I CAN’T EVEN WITH THE-,
Han Geng
PS: After pulling out what most probably is half of my hair, I have decided to enclose a photo taken some two minutes ago as I contemplated hurling myself out of the window before I realized that I was, in fact, in the first floor and the only consequence would probably be some broken tulips and an agitated gardener fellow.
PPS: But back to the photo. I expect that it can adequately express the turmoil, the grief, the disappointment, AND THE FURY that I feel.
PPPS: FURY, I TELL YOU, FURY.
PPPPS: By the way, I am out of dumplings. Would it be a terrible bother if I asked for some more?
(FEEL THE FURY. FEEEEEEEEEEEL IIIIIIIIIIIIT.)
Author's Note: Hi, guys! If you liked this one then you'll probably, PROBABLY like my other fic, The Kim Heechul China Travelogue. There are several parts but this is the first one. /end shameless advertising
Pairings: Hanchul with a hint of Kangin/Girl! Leeteuk and Kyuhyun/Girl!Sungmin (more pairings to come)
Rating: PG-13
Status: Part 6
Summary: AU. The epic summer of 1999 told via letters from Kim Heechul to Han Geng and back.
[LETTERS 1&2]
[LETTERS 3&4]
[LETTER 5]
[LETTER 6]
[LETTER 7]
*A LETTER FROM HAN GENG TO KIM HEECHUL*
Dearest Kim Heechul (notorious arsonist and more recently, a dabbler of the forgotten art of BLOWING PEOPLE’S CEILINGS OFF TO INFINITY),
I….
I cannot….
I just…..
What were you…
Well that was half a sheet of paper down the drain.
Heechul, I have been a part of many a hackneyed plot that would usually end in your crushing, not to mention painfully devastating failure (while I get maimed in the foreground) or in rare, nearly mythical, occasions, your triumphant victory (while I, apparently because the world hates me, still get maimed in the foreground).
But usually in your crushing, painfully devastating failure.
The past has shown us nothing but tears being shed along with all manner of clothing and dignity. Walls have been reduced to dust (and yes, that was a reference to your culinary exploits of so long ago). Police reports have been filed. Proper procedures have been executed along with all manner of files, contracts, and the occasional restraining order. And yet, at what point during the planning period did someone stop to think that maybe FIREWORKS + HOMEMADE BOMBS + KIM HEECHUL does not an intact ceiling make? And by the way, please tell Kangin that I am in fact QUITE ATTACHED to my ceiling thank you very much considering that it has sheltered me, protected me, and has never failed to shield me from prying eyes and thunderstorms.
Also monsters.
And maybe some sexual predators (I’m not naming any names BUT YES YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN, YES THAT ONE, EXACTLY).
And the zombie apocalypse that has been foretold would surely happen around this year.
Zombie…
…Apocalypse.
DEAR GOD WHAT HAVE YOU DONE YOU, YOU--- YOU FIEND?? YOU EVIL, EVIL-
Shame on you, Kim Heechul, SHAAAAAAME.
I cannot-
I just-
AGGGHHHH-
I AM SO ANGRY RIGHT NOW I CAN’T EVEN WITH THE-,
Han Geng
PS: After pulling out what most probably is half of my hair, I have decided to enclose a photo taken some two minutes ago as I contemplated hurling myself out of the window before I realized that I was, in fact, in the first floor and the only consequence would probably be some broken tulips and an agitated gardener fellow.
PPS: But back to the photo. I expect that it can adequately express the turmoil, the grief, the disappointment, AND THE FURY that I feel.
PPPS: FURY, I TELL YOU, FURY.
PPPPS: By the way, I am out of dumplings. Would it be a terrible bother if I asked for some more?
(FEEL THE FURY. FEEEEEEEEEEEL IIIIIIIIIIIIT.)
Author's Note: Hi, guys! If you liked this one then you'll probably, PROBABLY like my other fic, The Kim Heechul China Travelogue. There are several parts but this is the first one. /end shameless advertising