Sometimes - for no reason whatsoever, I feel utterly and entirely defeated. I feel a great loss and a sudden and complete devastation. I don't feel as if my life is over, but as if there is no real point in continuing - just sort of a Game Over, type of thing, but in life you can't just hit some reset button.

I don't know...I've never been a very ( Read more... )

My eyes are wide open, staring, yet I see nothing but the notes that resound through my mind. The music courses through me like blood. It gives me life. It invigorates me. My heart swells, my mind opens, and I feel a hundred emotions all at once. Happiness, dissolution, hope, emergence, fear, love, devotion, sorrow, anger, peace, glory, faith, ( Read more... )

I ask myself. Why is this dilemma so common to mankind: this doubt, this suffering? Why is it that so many people are so incapable of knowing who they are? They might tell you they know themselves and even be sure of it. However, even those of great intelligence are subject to the mightiest foe humanity may ever know: doubt. It destroys men daily, ( Read more... )

What are you doing here?
I...I don't know.
That's right, you don't know. Do you even have a plan?
Yes, I do.
No you don't.
You're right...I really don't. I thought I had a plan.
That's right you, thought you had a plan. What happened to it?
I don't know that either. It was never a very solid or particularly good plan, I suppose.
Exactly. Why is ( Read more... )

It is the foundation of any important or meaningful relationship, whether it is a friendship, romance, partnership, or any other sort of association. Though a person may be able to forgive it, even a single minor violation of trust may put a crack in that foundation that might never be able to be repaired.

I have found so few people who I have ever ( Read more... )

Five years. Tell me, how does one have such strong feelings after a full five years? Such strong feelings. Entirely unrequited too. Looking at pictures still tears me apart - I still can't get her out of my mind. After five years. I need to move on, but I can't. I thought I had moved on, but I was wrong. It's gone long past detrimental, too. It isn ( Read more... )

Well, my sister no longer shares my surname. She got married last Saturday in a beautiful ceremony at an art gallery in Fayetteville. It was pretty spectacular. She did much of the planning for the decorations and arrangements herself. She was helped significantly by many friends, including three awesome coordinators and many bridesmaids. My sister ( Read more... )

Instead of working on my research paper, like I SHOULD be doing I'm sitting here on the Internet (an excellent tool of the average procrastinator). I'm also being annoyed about the fact that for the second time in recent history, someone has locked out my Hotmail e-mail address by attempting to access it with incorrect passwords. I find it unlikely ( Read more... )

Last Saturday, my house was struck by lightning and burned down. Not entirely. I didn't lose much of my stuff really, since the fire mostly affected the upstairs floor. My parents lost almost all of their possessions. Water damage heavily affected the living room and kitchen ( Read more... )

After someone messed around with my LJ Icon, it disappeared, leaving me with a boring nothing next to my comments. I cannot have that ( Read more... )