Okay. Take one bored armadillo who wants to try out his mad vala skillz.

So I stole a tectonic plate.

So. Are things supposed to be moving around like that?

My knowledge of physics compels me to do something.

____

*waddles beneath the trees and climbs into a open window*

*looks up from where he thumped to the floor*

OH MY DEAR MASTER ERU WHAT IS THIS FREAKISH DEVILTRY.

A SMITING! YOU WILL NEVER WALK THIS EARTH AGAIN!

*curls into a ball and starts glowing*

I've decided to take a break out of my courting of my fair Ungoliant to tell you all a little story.

*strums guitar a bit*

It involves an elf with a fucking long name. And another elf without such a long name. But he had a round head so it's all good ( Read more... )

*dons little top hat ( Read more... )

Apparently I have been a very bad maia. I'd link, but my paws are shit on mouses. No searching down examples for you fuckers. You should just pay attention to my life instead ( Read more... )

DINNER.

Ahaha.

She smells like some sweet sugary substance. I will turn her into meatloaf for my sandwiches.

Oh, I figured out how to switch to human. Isn't it nice? Dude.

Whee. Meatloaf of Durin.

I decided I needed a hobby. So I was going to collect the prettiest things in middle earth.

My first one!

I'm going to put her in a glass case and stare at her all day.

Dude. I've been thinking ever since Manwe ran off to go do whatever it is he does when he isn't kidnapped. My life has no meaning. I mean, sure, I yearn for my old status and plot daily, but really. I need to make a contribution to the world. Think about someone either then myself.

That in mind, hey you!Consider yourself adopted ( Read more... )

All this kidnapping has put me in a mood.

So.

*kidnaps Manwe*

Dude!

We can bond over poptarts!

Ahahaha.

HACKER MAIA!

HACKER MAIA!

SOON TO BE HACKER VALA!

Erm.

I mean.

I have always existed.

I am not the result of clever file manipulating.

...bye.

*waddles off quickly to go read a dictionary or something*