I finally found this "lapjob" thingy everybody seems to be carrying around. It's very difficult to use, but luckily there is the voice mode.

Hey, what does this button do? Okay, so that's volume down. It's okay, I'm a fast learner. Volume up again and yes, much better this way ( Read more... )

I'm sorry to say George had to be sedated while on the train. Now that he is alert - I've shoved him in the closet in the entrance hall ( Read more... )

Please help me!

I'm trapped in the hall coat closet with the King of France!

-Eric

Does anyone know how to get gum our of hair?

Also I'm still imprisoned in this room with my homocidal twin brother. Please send help or food or something to read.

I already counted all my visible freckles. I have 6,783 of them on my front, excluding my nether regions.

Oy! George has gone mental. He keeps hitting me over the head with rubber chicken filled with lead. He doesn't seem to knwo who he is or who I am!

He is finally alseep!

Someone, anyone

HELP ME!

-Fred

Who am I?

We've gone deaf from all this bloody shouting. We hope you are all happy. We can't hear what we are reading. It is all gibberish.

It all looks like this:

":D >:D< >:) OMG!!!!!!!!11 ( Read more... )

Mum has told us she will kill us and then take our corpses and stuff them with Doxies and bury us so that we will suffer for all eternity. Unless - we go back and do our last year at Hogwarts. Bloody bitter old battleaxe...oh. Sorry Mum ( Read more... )