all this english crap has made me forget something real important: arnold got christened as the bonafide governator of california the other day, and i didn't even get to be there because i had to be with all these ass-jumpin' nancies in england. i mean, england is so homo that their next commander in chief got his willy sucked on by his manservant ( Read more... )

oh yeah, i forgot to tell y'all. i am gonna see what steps i need to take to get massochoosisets officially OUT of america. they can go hang out with france. we really don't need those ass jumpin' nancies runnin' around in legal pairs. it makes me madder'anheck.

y'all might have noticed that my journal disappeared for a little while. see, my greatest fear came true. laura found it. she read everything. she read all about my chocolate penis, and all my secret thoughts about her. i couldn't believe it, i did such a good job of hiding it from her all these years. all this time we only ever got jiggy wid it in ( Read more... )

my man arnold won! he won real good.

i think people are being TOO HARD on the good old american boys who killed the iraqi tiger. he was probably a terrorist too. after all, aladdins like their tigers.

now, i know i've posted about my love for chuck norris before, but there's another action hero i love almost as much:


( Read more... )

my fellow americans ( Read more... )

hello y'all i know it's been a long time, but i've got something important to say. y'all need to join pat robertson in praying that the next court will make sodomy illegal again. it's against the laws of god.

well, kiddos. i thought i better check in, since it's sure been awhile since i left y'all a little note in here ( Read more... )

hey y'all ( Read more... )